


That One Fortunate Accident

by byunkim0421



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alpha Byun Baekhyun, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Baby Pups, Baekchen - Freeform, Beta Kim Jongdae | Chen, Bottom Byun Baekhyun, Bottom Kim Jongdae | Chen, Community: chenpionships, Dinosaurs, M/M, Mpreg, No Character Death, Preschool, Rating: NC17, Shameless Smut, Top Byun Baekhyun, Top Kim Jongdae | Chen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-06
Updated: 2018-05-06
Packaged: 2019-05-02 23:48:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,488
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14556252
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/byunkim0421/pseuds/byunkim0421
Summary: Prompt: Chen knew having sex with his best friend to "comfort" him was a bad idea. Chen knew that unprotected sex was a bad idea - even when they were both adults and a few months away from presenting. Chen knew he would only get hurt once Baekhyun would eventually go to the one he liked. But Chen was stupid... and a coward who would rather run away from his problems than face them. Now, 4 years later, shouldn't he tell Baekhyun that their one and only night together had some consequences?





	That One Fortunate Accident

**Author's Note:**

> My first ever Chenpionships entry! Please love it a lot! Note: there will be some typos. Forgive them please.

_Breathe. Just breathe. Breathe, Jongdae. Everything will be alright._

Lights flashed red and blue until everything faded to black. Lights flashed like beams passing by until everything went black again. A bright light shone while beeps pulsed faintly in the background. A face slowly came to Jongdae’s vision followed by a sharp pain on his lower abdomen. Reality came to focus again.

“We’re going to have to bring the baby out now, sir. We have no choice.” The doctor spoke sternly.

“No. He’ll have a natural birth. That’s what he wants, I’m sorry.” Kyungsoo reasoned. Jongdae groaned.

“He’s not crowning, sir. The bleeding needs to be stopped if you want to save them both. We have to C-Section him.”

“No! I will push this monster out!” Jongdae screamed, crushing Kyungsoo’s hand.

“Are you sure? Your type of pregnancy’s difficult, Jongdae. You’ve lost so much blood. Fuck, I shouldn’t have left you in that restaurant.” Kyungsoo had to be emotional now?

“I’m gonna push, doctor.” Jongdae breathed through gritted teeth. The doctor wanted to say something but he growled. A beta growled?

“But Jongdae, your pup will be three weeks early. Is it safe?” Kyungsoo worried.

“Are we even safe now?” Jongdae screamed, testing the push. His best friend gave up. The doctor began counting. Jongdae braced himself on Kyungsoo’s dying hand. 1…2…

“FUCK YOU BYUN BAEKHYUN!”

* * *

 

If those were Jongdae’s final words before dying, he definitely had no regrets. But he’s alive, and officially a father of a baby boy. They were supposed to be baby boys and a girl but…uh…this surviving baby boy ate them in the womb. Kyungsoo chuckled at his dark humoured joke. The doctor tried to keep an even face.

“Let’s give Mr. Kim some time to rest. He’s done incredibly well for an impulse delivery.” The doctor rubbed Jongdae’s shoulder while he dozed off. “Are you his mate?”

“Me? No, I’m just his friend. The mate’s our other best friend he ran away from.” Kyungsoo explained. The doctor’s brows shot up. “You didn’t need to know that, sorry. Will there be any medications needed for him or the baby?” The doctor led him outside so Jongdae could rest.

When he woke up, it all felt like a nightmare; the car crashing through the restaurant, his impulse childbirth, feeling shards of glass all over his body, the doctor forcing a C-section on him, hearing Kyungsoo say it’s a boy. It all felt… _beep beep…beep beep…_ like a nightmare. Jongdae’s eyes opened when he felt his belly flat. He looked down to realise it wasn’t a nightmare. He gave birth already. To a boy?

The door opened, Kyungsoo entering with some fruits. Jongdae was having a panic attack. His bump was gone. His child was gone! Did it die? Did they force it out of him? He was about to speak when Kyungsoo leaned over his bed to press a buzzer.

“Yes, Mr. Do?” a nurse answered from the mini speaker.

“Please bring the baby over. His dad’s awake.” Kyungsoo ruffled Jongdae’s greasy hair mindlessly.

“He? It’s alive? I have a boy?” Jongdae whispered.

“Mhmm. You were supposed to have three pups but this one ate all of them in you.” Kyungsoo shrugged.

“That’s a joke, right? I heard you a while ago trying to scare the doctor.” Jongdae said deadpan while his best friend chuckled.

“And you don’t have a boy. You and Baekhyun have a boy. Shit, how am I going to answer when we see each other next week?” Kyungsoo was suddenly deep in thought.

A knock made them aware again. Kyungsoo helped Jongdae sit up while the nurse wheeled in a glass crib.

“Oh my god, are you sure it’s him?” Kyungsoo made a face. The nurse nodded. “That thing came out of him? It’s huge!”

“Almost six pounds, sir. Mr. Kim’s amazing to push out this angel.” The nurse smiled lovingly at the sleeping child.

“He should after taking that alpha dick.” Kyungsoo quipped. Jongdae slapped his back hard. The nurse excused herself sheepishly.

Kyungsoo wheeled the crib closer. He didn’t touch the pup. He also ordered the rest to not touch him without gloves so Jongdae could naturally imprint on him. He should know that; he worked in this hospital as nurse for newborn pups.

Jongdae held his breath as it got closer to him. When he saw the nameless blue tag around his ankle, Jongdae wiped his eye with a chuckle. It was real. His baby boy’s alive after all that. They both were. He was about to pick him up when he realised he didn’t know how. Kyungsoo was one step ahead with a blanket. He picked up the child and placed it in his father’s arms. The baby moved slightly from his sleep, trying to get comfortable. Jongdae got his tiny hand and kissed it. The baby’s eyes opened slowly.

Kyungsoo smiled at the sight. He looked exactly like Jongdae. All except the brows and cheeks. Still, it couldn’t be denied this baby was Jongdae’s. For the first time since seeing the ugly cruel world, the baby smiled slightly. Jongdae mumbled to his soft forehead before placing a light kiss.

“Kyungsoo-yah, meet your godchild Kim Daeul.” Jongdae’s eyes glistened under the fluorescence. Kyungsoo sat down by his leg and smiled peacefully. It was a beautiful sight to see, but Kyungsoo had reservations. The baby was going to be officially named Kim Daeul. A Kim. If only Baekhyun knew, he thought. He hoped Baekhyun was here for this and knew.

* * *

**8 months and 2 weeks ago…**

 

The bang on the door’s a little too hard for Jongdae’s liking. He sighed and unlocked the door. Kyungsoo and Baekhyun looked so worried for him. He just sent the news that his older boyfriend Kim Minseok dumped him because he’s officially a beta.

It didn’t matter, Minseok usually said that before Jongdae’s presentation. Of course he could say that, he’s an omega hoping for an alpha boyfriend. Jongdae’s parents were neither omegas so his chances of being one were very small. Jongdae being a late bloomer became a sign he would be an alpha. Minseok researched the probability on it. He even undermined the chances of a beta impregnating an omega, the chances of a beta having kids in general. Since Minseok went as far as thinking they would have kids, Jongdae always made sure to be responsible when they mated. He didn’t want to claim Minseok until his presentation too. The younger didn’t expect any from it. He’s skeptical about science.

But in the end, it mattered to Minseok. A lot. He’s told his friends, his parents, that Jongdae would be an alpha. Knowing he wasn’t just made Jongdae feel like he wasn’t enough. Minseok rubbed it to his face further when he saw him flirting with another guy; a sure alpha, at the coffee shop they always stayed in. Jongdae didn’t confront him for it. But he did wait for Minseok to notice his presence. When he did, Jongdae turned away and left it as is. The most painful part: Minseok got the message. He didn’t even run after Jongdae or talked to him about it.

Now, two days after that, Jongdae’s best friends stood in front of him with alcohol and comfort food. Jongdae still had his earphones on when the two entered his apartment. Kyungsoo went straight to the kitchen while Baekhyun stood in the middle of the room, looking at Jongdae. The youngest wore his classic black ensemble while Baekhyun looked more casual in washed denims, a plain white shirt, and a fluffy blue hoodie. Jongdae thought they were dressed up for an uninvited visit.

Jongdae’s moved out of the Minseok’s place when the other was out. He also left the spare key. He didn’t leave a trace of him in that place nor did he bring any trace of Minseok in his. Jongdae’s parents were supportive of him so they bought an apartment for him just near the campus for his comfort. It was conveniently the midpoint of Baekhyun and Kyungsoo’s houses. So the two rushed to comfort their lone friend once he was settled in.

Jongdae met Baekhyun’s eye and chuckled. He begged the other to quit being a sad puppy and that he’s fine. Baekhyun nodded and went to help Kyungsoo. Was he really fine? He knew Baekhyun completely saw right through him but why did the eldest not confront him about it?

Dinner with his friends was nice. He laughed and bullied Kyungsoo like always. Kyungsoo rode along for the brokenhearted’s sake but Baekhyun was quieter than usual. Jongdae bumped his foot to his under the table and arched a questioning brow. The eldest gave a sad tight-lipped smile and continued eating. Jongdae pushed his feelings aside to tend to his oddly acting best friend.

Baekhyun picked out the cucumbers out of the sushi they ordered and passed them to Jongdae’s plate. The beta ate them all, giving his beef to Baekhyun generously. Kyungsoo noticed the exchange, looking at Baekhyun skeptically. The eldest’s pupils shook. The youngest discreetly pointed his fork to Jongdae, asking if they’re flirting. Baekhyun shook his head a bit but his ears turned red. Kyungsoo smiled a bit, keeping his head as low as possible. Baekhyun felt sweat drip down his nape even if it’s very cold in Jongdae’s place.

After some 3S (shots, stories, and shouting), Kyungsoo called it a night and asked Baekhyun if he’d go soon. Jongdae answered for him, saying he’ll sleepover since they had an early class the next morning. Baekhyun was about to decline but the owner of the place gave him a hard stare. Kyungsoo felt something fishy but left the two, promising to text when he got home. Once Baekhyun and Jongdae were left, the mood of the room dropped immediately.

Baekhyun’s aware; so aware that he sensed Jongdae’s underlying feelings all the time. They separated the trash in silence, glancing at each other from time to time. Jongdae put the sponge down with the plate and lowered his head. He wiped his eye discreetly. Baekhyun’s been too observant of him so it wasn’t a secret that he teared up. He slid his arms around Jongdae from behind and rest his cheek on his shoulder. Jongdae chuckled and held Baekhyun’s hands over his stomach.

“Sorry, just couldn’t help it.” Jongdae mumbled.

“It’s okay,” Baekhyun pouted. “Let it out, Chennie.” The cute nickname they teased each other with came out after years. Baekhyun was Bobohu, Jongdae was Chen, and Kyungsoo was Kyungie. Jongdae nodded with a smile. He didn’t cry anymore. Baekhyun always made him smile by being cute despite being older by a few months. Jongdae told Baekhyun to watch something, that he’ll do the cleaning up alone.

Baekhyun flopped on the sofa with his phone, sending a text to his parents that he’d stay overnight. They chatted a bit about graduation news and college applications, avoiding feelings in general. They were finally graduating high school and decided to go to college together. They wondered if Kyungsoo would room with them and imagined things going crazy. After a light laugh, Jongdae quieted himself again.

Baekhyun watched TV in the living room while the other brought out the trash. Jongdae dropped a bottle, followed by a hard curse with his fall. Baekhyun stood up slowly and checked on him. His friend was on the floor, crying with his hand bleeding. Baekhyun got him up from the floor and checked for other pieces of glass on him. Jongdae still cried as he looked up to the ceiling. He’s cursing himself for being a beta, for being not enough. Baekhyun didn’t like hearing or seeing it. There was nothing wrong about being a beta. It only became such because of Minseok.

“I told you he wasn’t that in to you.” Baekhyun whispered, checking the bleeding wound on Jongdae’s hand. He dabbed the hem of his jacket to stop the bleeding.

“Please keep going. I deserve it.” Jongdae lowered his head in shame then winced while his friend poked around the finger wound.

“I told you he wanted a knot, not you.” He winced, because of his finger and Baekhyun’s words.

“You really kept going.” Jongdae hit his friend’s arm. It made the both of them smile. Suddenly, Baekhyun put Jongdae’s bleeding finger in his mouth and sucked.

Jongdae couldn’t believe how sexual it looked. Seeing his friend’s lips around his finger made him succumb to the alcohol floating in his system. Baekhyun blinked then sucked harder. He jerked a bit then got something from his mouth. Jongdae watched him show his bloodstained tongue as he pulled something off it. A tiny piece of glass was right in front of his eyes.

“That could’ve killed you.” Baekhyun smiled proudly to himself. Jongdae blinked several times as Baekhyun covered his wound with a cute angel band-aid.

“Have you presented?” What a random question. Baekhyun’s brows furrowed then shook his head. “Won’t be long, right? Kyungsoo’s also a beta. Not that it matters to us.”

“Definitely not! Alpha, beta, or omega, we’ll stick together. We’ll have mates and pups and we’ll have them marry each other!” Baekhyun clapped, thinking it was a good idea. It wasn’t.

“Maybe I’m not giving my daughter to your child, Baek. Too loud and moody,” Jongdae chuckled. Baekhyun agreed. They needed Kyungsoo’s kids to even the playing field.

Jongdae ran his non-injured fingers in Baekhyun’s dark brown hair. They’re both tired and slightly tipsy. Baekhyun always closed his eyes when Jongdae did that. It’s like stroking a pet. They had classes the next day and the vice-principal would smack their heads for underage drinking if they’re seen with a slight sign of alcohol intake.

“Why are you so quiet tonight?” Jongdae whispered. Baekhyun opened his eyes.

“You’re hurt. It’s different when you’re upset. Everyone’s mood goes down when the optimistic one’s upset.” Baekhyun kissed the band-aid and patted his friend’s hand.

They admitted they’re the closest among them three because of their age. Kyungsoo acknowledged it too. Not once did the two made him feel left out. Couple of times did they forget Baekhyun’s older because Jongdae always took care of him. It’s the other way around now, and all Baekhyun wants is to make Jongdae smile again.

They cleaned the kitchen floor carefully, stealing more glances at each other. Both were still wary of each other’s feelings. Baekhyun tied the trash bag and went out to throw it himself. Jongdae stood in his apartment, alone again, the emotions rushing back. He quickly opened another beer and chugged it down. It poured down his chin and neck, soaking his shirt slightly. Anything to drown his pathetic feelings. Anything.

The door opened, Baekhyun entering while he sang a song. Jongdae put the bottle down, sniffing. His instincts didn’t usually fail him. While he’s a beta who was supposed to be oblivious to alpha and omega scents, he trained his senses to be like an alpha’s. For Minseok. He looked at Baekhyun, who took off the jacket, while he wiped his chin with his forearm. He called him over, hoping his instinct was wrong. Once Baekhyun stood in front of him, Jongdae’s eyes raked his body, settling to his pants.

“Are you sure you haven’t presented?” Jongdae met his eyes. Baekhyun rubbed his nape, avoiding the topic. “You have.”

“Is—is there an omega on your floor? The heat smell’s pretty intense.” Baekhyun looked guilty for lying.

“When? Why didn’t you tell me?” Jongdae narrowed his eyes. _Me, not us. That’s something._

“You broke up with an omega who wanted an alpha. I thought,” Baekhyun sighed. “I thought you’d hate alphas.” His voice got softer.

“You think I’d hate you for being an alpha. I think I’d hate you more for keeping it a secret.” Jongdae scoffed.

“I was going to tell you. Just...when you’re not like this anymore,” Baekhyun looked so shy. It wasn’t very alpha of him. Jongdae felt the alcohol set in.

Baekhyun got the leftover beer and drank from it to drown his own embarrassment. He didn’t like drinking much but managed to stomach this down. In a whiplash of movements, he found himself pinned on the wall with Jongdae’s face buried to his neck. Baekhyun shook as Jongdae’s breath tickled his neck.

“Are you really smelling me?” Baekhyun freaked. Jongdae’s thigh rubbed against his crotch. “J-Jongdae, you’re drunk.”

“Nope,” the pop at the end of the word made Jongdae’s lips press to Baekhyun’s neck. “Why do you have to look good tonight of all nights?”

“I—I’m not. I didn’t even shower before going here.” Baekhyun was a trembling nervous mess. Jongdae bit his earlobe. “Shit, don’t do this Jongdae. I’m not Minseok!” The elder said louder, pinning Jongdae to the counter now. An alpha’s strength was different indeed.

Jongdae’s senses came back slowly. He looked up again to control his tears. Baekhyun’s forehead rest on his shoulder while he tried to calm himself. He could only control so much with a rut, one encouraged by his best friend too. The younger began whispering his apologies, hugging Baekhyun around the waist. Baekhyun couldn’t take it anymore. He hugged Jongdae, letting him cry to his shoulder. The hug felt like a squeeze of tears to exit Jongdae’s system. Baekhyun kissed his head then hushed him.

Jongdae was entering the state of self-pity. He kept apologising to Baekhyun, to Minseok, to all alphas, but still cursed himself for not being enough. Baekhyun cupped his face and wiped his cheeks.

“Don’t say that. You’re more than enough, Jongdae. Minseok’s stupid for wanting a knot, not someone who would love him truly.” Baekhyun pep-talked. “It’s not your fault he wanted something else. You’ll be loved by someone better, I’m sure of it. Fuck, I want to punch him for hurting you.” Baekhyun pouted. “How can he dump someone as cute as you, as...as kind and,” Baekhyun held his face and looked directly to his eyes. He couldn’t continue.

“It hurts, Baek. Why does it hurt? Science can’t explain this!” Jongdae kept hitting his chest. He felt pathetic for crying, for the most part.

“Fuck Minseok and his stupid science. His desperation can’t be explained by science, I tell you.” Baekhyun scoffed.

“I shouldn’t have given him my first.” Jongdae wiped his eyes on Baekhyun’s shirt. The elder froze. His mouth tasted sour.

“You did what?”

“I—yeah, we tried to mate. I didn’t really enjoy it as much as he did.” Jongdae turned his face away. His best friend really didn’t need to know that.

No wonder it hurt. Jongdae gave up a lot for Minseok. Baekhyun really made a mental note to punch Minseok just so he knew what an alpha was like when mad. He wondered what pushed Jongdae to do it. His best friend’s been a good Catholic, one that always reminded him to be responsible about his body. Who knew he would be the first to break that? Baekhyun didn’t blame him for it. It could be Minseok’s fault too. That guy always manipulated Jongdae to his advantage. Baekhyun had a feeling it was the same in this situation.

“Make it go away, Baek. Please,” Jongdae whispered.

“Hmmm?” Baekhyun directed his attention to him again.

“Make it go away, please alpha. Please make it go away,” Jongdae’s eyes were getting deeper, darker. Baekhyun was about to step back but their lips locked. He tried to fight it but Jongdae’s tongue licked the roof of his mouth. Baekhyun gripped the countertop, gathering the last of his brain cells. But his body snapped.

He hooked his hands under Jongdae’s knees and lifted him on the counter. Jongdae was having a frenzy with Baekhyun’s mouth. He kept moaning and whispering to let the pain end, that he’d give anything to the alpha. Baekhyun hummed in submission, whispering that Jongdae’s going to be fine. And Jongdae trusted him.

Baekhyun’s hands slid down to his sides while Jongdae tilted his head up to give him more room. He dragged his lips on Jongdae’s neck, breathing hard. Jongdae felt Baekhyun holding back. There was a wall between them despite being so close together. He whined to hurry up but Baekhyun shook his head, taking his time kissing the other’s neck.

“Are you sure about this?” Baekhyun met his eyes, licking his lips.

“More than anything. Please, I need you Baekhyun.” Jongdae cupped his face to place a soft kiss on his lips. Baekhyun lifted him off the counter, stumbling backwards with only their lips together. Jongdae’s back hit the wall while his hands fumbled with Baekhyun’s jeans. The alpha’s hands were on the wall to trap Jongdae as the other sucked his neck and shoulders, leaving blossoming clots on it.

Baekhyun opened his eyes, surprised to be looking at the wall and not his best friend. The beta’s fingers slid on top of Baekhyun’s boxers while he kissed his lower abdomen. Baekhyun whimpered, not looking down. It would just horrify him to confirm that his best friend in the entire world’s on his knees to blow him. He closed his eyes to level his sanity.

Jongdae’s not a newbie to this. He did this for Minseok so many times. He looked up to Baekhyun’s strained expression then took him in his mouth. Baekhyun’s eyes opened as he slapped the wall because of the feeling. Jongdae didn’t wait for permission. He kept his lips tight and cheeks hollow as he bobbed his head up and down. Baekhyun threw his head back, groaning loudly. He flexed his hips, pushing deeper in Jongdae’s mouth.

Another groan escaped the alpha’s lips. It gave Jongdae more confidence. He licked the underside, tracing the vein with the tip of his tongue. Baekhyun’s knees were loosening. Jongdae gripped his thighs and let his mouth do the work.

“Is this good enough? Am I good enough already? I’ve been nothing but good to you, right?” Jongdae asked, lapping on Baekhyun’s swelling knot. All the sensualness disappeared in Baekhyun. He finally looked down to his best friend, his heart breaking for him. Jongdae’s still doubting his worth. He’s doing this to find his worth.

Baekhyun cupped his face and made him look up to him. Jongdae looked so wrecked with saliva and precum on his lips and chin. Baekhyun wondered how could anyone break the strongest person he knew. How could someone ruin his pride because of a stupid knot? Was having one the best thing in the world? Baekhyun didn’t want Jongdae to feel shameful of himself anymore. Even if he had to…

“Jongdae,” Baekhyun leaned down to kiss him. “I’m not Minseok.” It’s like the magic word to be released from a trance. Jongdae’s eyes went wide. Even if Jongdae barely said his name, Baekhyun knew he was referring to the other and not him. “But I will be if it will make you feel better,” Jongdae’s brows furrowed as he stood up.

Baekhyun offered his wrists to Jongdae as a sign of submission. Jongdae looked at them warily then to Baekhyun’s eyes. He wasn’t kidding around this time. An alpha would lower himself for the sake of someone else. It was the most baffling thing Jongdae’s ever seen. Who was he to receive this? Has Baekhyun gone out of his mind?

His alpha best friend would be an omega for him. For one time. Just so he could feel better. Jongdae felt something swell and drop in his chest. Baekhyun looked so contrite in front of him. He had to blink twice to make sure it was real. When Baekhyun didn’t disappear, Jongdae’s sanity did.

Shirts flew everywhere while they made their way to Jongdae’s room. Baekhyun dropped on the bed while Jongdae pulled his pants off. His hand slid down Baekhyun’s thighs.

“This is so wrong,” Baekhyun muttered under his breath, covering his eyes with his arm while Jongdae stroked him.

“Let me make you feel good for comforting me, please.” Jongdae spoke with so much sincerity, Baekhyun sat up and kissed him again. No one was drunk so they’d really remember this tomorrow.

“Let me. I promised you.” Baekhyun pulled Jongdae down to bed and climbed on top of him.

Jongdae thought he was going crazy. He’s gotten blows before but not like what Baekhyun gave. It was slow, so slow everything could be felt. Baekhyun deep throated him, eyes closed while he moaned around. Jongdae got his elbows to look. Their eyes met, the entire room electrifying.

If having Baekhyun’s lips around his finger was hot, his lips around Jongdae’s dick was downright erotic. He flexed his hips, going deeper in Baekhyun’s mouth. The other suddenly sucked. The moan from Jongdae’s lips bounced off the walls. Baekhyun released him a pop and a smirk.

“Again?” Baekhyun teased, his fingers drawing circles on Jongdae’s thigh.

“Have you done this before?” Jongdae heaved a breath. The other shook his head. “When did you even present?”

“Last week?” Baekhyun tried to remember. Jongdae groaned. “So are you going to show me your tricks or what?”

Jongdae sat up and shook his head. “Make me.” Baekhyun wasn’t the type to back down. He gagged himself on Jongdae, sucking harder. Jongdae tilted to his head to see his cheeks hollow. He was close. The way he shifted on the bed became more frequent. Baekhyun sucked hard with his eyes on Jongdae. The beta couldn’t take it anymore. The swirl of Baekhyun’s tongue around his tip with a slurping sound mixed with Jongdae’s gasp of Baekhyun’s name as he released in the other’s mouth.

Baekhyun held the beta’s thighs as he swallowed as much as he could. Jongdae’s elbows gave out as he panted. Baekhyun licked him clean then crawled over him. They shared a slow kiss while Baekhyun rutted himself on the other. Jongdae smiled after sucking Baekhyun’s lower lip. He stopped himself from saying that he wanted to do that for so long.

Baekhyun laid beside him, waiting expectantly. Jongdae huffed a breath and got on him to spread his legs. The alpha reached for his pants for a condom and passed it to Jongdae. Why Baekhyun had one in his pants, no one asked. The beta began working his fingers in. It may be Baekhyun’s first blow but he wasn’t new to fingering. Jongdae seemed pleased with how the other took his fingers in without lube. He kept spitting on his whole to ease the pressure. Jongdae dipped his tongue in Baekhyun. The other moaned so loud, shocked by the intrusion, and gripped Jongdae’s hair.

Jongdae pushed two fingers in this time while he lapped on the alpha’s dick. Baekhyun remembered he submitted to him so he put his wrists above his head, holding the headboard tightly. He could crush the wood if he wanted to.

 

“Jongdae, come on!” Baekhyun whined, eyes shut tight.

“Hey, be nice.” Jongdae dragged his fingers out slowly.

“Please Jongdae, d-do it already!”

Jongdae slammed his fingers roughly in, pumping it in and out to match Baekhyun’s heightening tone. His other hand deftly wrapped himself, spitting on his hand to make up for their lack of lube. Baekhyun felt a little empty with nothing in him already.

“Breathe,” Jongdae ran his wet thumb over Baekhyun’s lips after tying Baekhyun’s wrists to his bed with his belt. The other nodded, bracing himself. Jongdae finally thrust in. The pressure made Baekhyun gasp. Jongdae felt heady with the tightness. He wasn’t sure if he was drunk or really washed with euphoria. He let Baekhyun adjust before moving.

They rocked into each other steadily, more focused on the feeling than what it meant. Jongdae leaned forward, undoing Baekhyun’s wrists after seeing his pale skin reddening. He kissed the other’s sweaty temple then tucked his face to his neck. “I’m sorry, I’m really sorry but I have to.” Baekhyun whimpered once Jongdae fucked him in earnest. Baekhyun felt the back of this thighs would bruise because of the strength of Jongdae’s hipbones crashing in to them. Jongdae’s weight added to the pressure on Baekhyun’s knot as it rubbed against the other’s stomach.

Baekhyun held on to him tightly, nails dragging down his back. Jongdae was done. He jerked twice, choking gasps muffled on Baekhyun’s neck. The alpha helped him ride it out, whispering sweet nothings to him. Baekhyun held Jongdae as he panted. His shoulder suddenly got wet. Jongdae’s body trembled, his sobs meeting his best friend’s skin. Baekhyun couldn’t do anything but stare at the ceiling and hold together what was left of Jongdae’s crumbling pride.

They stayed like that until Jongdae fell asleep on top of him. Baekhyun’s not worried about getting impregnated. Betas can’t do that to alphas. And Jongdae’s protected. He then realised he just lost his virginity to his own best friend. He looked around the dim room for some kind of solace. He didn’t know what to think. He’s been awake all night to let everything sink in.

They just fucked but something in Baekhyun’s chest felt weird. It must be the hoe feeling, he thought, because he just let the other use his body as he pleased. He blinked sleepily, trying to make out of the digital clock by the bedside table. It’s almost midnight. They still had classes the next day so he tried to sleep. He squirmed a bit, feeling Jongdae in him. He hoped he could walk properly tomorrow or the vice-principal would notice. High school admins were hawks, at least in the one they attended.

His legs were a little sore and he wasn’t sure if he could sit properly. Jongdae worked him good. Baekhyun peeked at the other’s sleeping face. Baekhyun’s eyes widened when the other still had a tear escape his eye while he slept. Baekhyun kissed it away and tucked his face to the other’s neck to sleep.

Just as that happened, Jongdae woke up. He didn’t move, but his mind raced. Dark brown hair tickled his cheek, not blond. This wasn’t Minseok. He wasn’t inside Minseok. He closed his eyes, all senses alerting him it’s Baekhyun. His pale skin looked like strawberries grew in them. Jongdae nuzzled his face to his skin, thankful his best friend still smelled like strawberries. _Strawberries and him, to be exact._

This was a horrible idea but he’d regret that later. For now, he would just close his eyes and hold on to his solace while he could. He kissed Baekhyun’s forehead then whispered his thanks. Slowly, he pulled out. Jongdae’s amazed how deep Baekhyun slept, not moving an inch while it happened. Jongdae took the condom off and threw it on the floor. He cleaned himself then saw the moon light Baekhyun’s naked body. He sighed, thinking of how to confess his sins. He stepped on another foil, realising Baekhyun didn’t came again. He saw the redness on Baekhyun’s wrists. Jongdae thought the game must be fair.

Baekhyun shifted a bit in his sleep. He felt the bed rock slightly. He groaned slightly, lifting his hips heavily. He rubbed his eye then lifted his head off the pillow. He didn’t know how long he’s been asleep but that didn’t matter.

“What are you doing?” Baekhyun looked at Jongdae straddling his hips.

“I—uh, you didn’t come last night. It’s not how first times are supposed to be.” Jongdae mumbled shyly. He remembered how unfortunate his first time was. Baekhyun didn’t deserve that, he thought.

“Huh? It’s…” Baekhyun’s brain cells clicked. He’s too stiff and throbbing painfully. Jongdae’s hand been stroking him slowly. “Okay,” he exhaled.

Jongdae slowly sank down to Baekhyun. The alpha groaned so loud, Jongdae could feel the vibrations. The beta put his hands on Baekhyun’s chest and started to move. A string of curses and moans escaped Baekhyun while he shut his eyes. The feeling of Jongdae around him felt like his mind’s snapping from the strings of his body. Baekhyun placed his hands on Jongdae’s hips to steady him. One slam from gravity sent Baekhyun into a frenzy as Jongdae took the knot in.

Jongdae licked his lips, over-sensitive at the feeling of something so big inside him. Baekhyun sat up and let Jongdae move as he wished. He licked and sucked his neck and chest. Jongdae wrapped his arms around Baekhyun, murmuring how good it felt. Baekhyun met his movements, getting deeper if possible.

Baekhyun couldn’t understand how his nerves felt so much. His skin tingled each time Jongdae came down hard on him. He looked down out of curiosity. He adjusted his hand, feeling a foil beneath it. The light from the moon barely helped his eyes adjust to the darkness.

“Shit, Jongdae, stop!” Baekhyun tried to still him.

“No, don’t please!” Jongdae whined, circling his hips to feel Baekhyun’s entire length on his walls.

“Jongdae, what are you doing? We’re unprotected!” Baekhyun panicked. He struggled against Jongdae’s lustful movements and responsibility. Jongdae stopped bouncing on his dick and met his eyes.

“Why? Don’t you like it raw?”

Baekhyun’s jaw dropped. The internal struggle continued. Jongdae kissed his jaw, nipping on his earlobe. They established that it made Baekhyun very weak, especially a suck just below his ear. Baekhyun groaned and rolled them over. “You’re going to be the end of me, Jongdae.”

Jongdae’s eyes looked so lustful, Baekhyun thought he was the devil himself. They kissed roughly, tongues dancing just when Baekhyun snapped his hips forward. Jongdae’s mouth fell open at the strength. Baekhyun did it repeatedly, relishing the sounds the beta made for him. It made his confidence grow.

Jongdae couldn’t believe this was Baekhyun’s first time. It felt different being the one that bottom now. He’s played with himself, seldomly with Minseok, but this felt different. It felt absolutely amazing. Baekhyun kept thrusting with all his strength, slamming in Jongdae with so much force, he thought Jongdae’s prostate might call a timeout.

“This is so good! How can this be so good, Baek? Fuck, you’re so much better than Minseok.” Jongdae panted. Baekhyun pulled out immediately, slapping Jongdae’s thigh hard.

“It’s rude to compare us. Are you offending me?” Baekhyun held his neck as he realigned himself again.

“You know how competitive I get. You know I like to win, Jongdae.”

“Make me forget about him.” Jongdae challenged.

Jongdae kept his mouth slacked while Baekhyun gagged him. He pumped himself, feeling nasty by the treatment. Baekhyun came in his mouth, filling it well until it leaked down Jongdae’s chin. The alpha kissed him roughly, making him stand so they could move back to bed. He straddled his lap, grabbing both of their cocks with one hand to rub together. Jongdae arched his back, muscles clenching. “Feel good?” Baekhyun’s voice was raspy. Jongdae could only whimper.

The alpha hooked Jongdae’s legs over his shoulders and lost himself inside. “Shit Jongdae, I thought you top always.” Baekhyun pushed himself deeper.

“I’d bottom if you keep this up.” Jongdae whimpered at the feeling Baekhyun’s knot pounding his rim. “Knot me, please Baek. Tell me I’m good enough,” _The magic words._

But Baekhyun could be sly when he wanted to. He pumped Jongdae’s throbbing member. He realised Jongdae wasn’t really stretched that much. Minseok barely topped then. Jongdae saw stars when the fucking got rough. Baekhyun knew he was close so he shoved his knot deep in Jongdae, making Jongdae send ropes of white between them.

Once Jongdae opened his eyes, Baekhyun loomed over him like the alpha that he was. Jongdae never saw him this powerful until then.

“Done?” Jongdae whispered. Baekhyun shook his head, looking down at the mess beneath him called Jongdae.

“You came. Not me.” Baekhyun wiped the cum on his fingers on the other’s abs. “Are you forgetting alphas need at least three or more before pulling out?”

“Huh?” Jongdae didn’t get it. Baekhyun moved his hips slowly.

“Knot me, please Baek.” The alpha repeated. Shit, he did ask for it. Their eyes met again. They felt shivers down their spines.

“One more,” Jongdae nodded. Baekhyun lowered himself to kiss him before rocking again.

Jongdae was spent after the second round. He was on all fours when Baekhyun came again, painting his hole. It had him screaming when Baekhyun made him kneel with hands on his lap. The alpha was on his elbows thrusting upwards to Jongdae’s abused hole. The knot barely gave them some distance. Baekhyun threw his head back as he came, screaming the beta’s name reverently. Jongdae came with him, very dry this time.

Round three called for a change of location. Baekhyun got Jongdae bent over his study desk before pushing back in. The drag of the length made him impatient. Baekhyun made sure to make him remember. “Count,” He sucked the beta’s neck for good measure.

Jongdae gasped at the feeling. Baekhuyn was suddenly bigger. It felt never-ending as he counted per inch. Before he could let out another number, Baekhyun doubled his thrusts, knocking the air out of him. If Jongdae wanted Baekhyun to make him feel good, Baekhyun was being selfish by using Jongdae for his own pleasure.

The slapping sounds matched Jongdae’s moans. Baekhyun reached over and stroked him fast until he came on the wood. Baekhyun bottom out as he painted his desk white. Jongdae felt like an omega for begging more. He let Baekhyun rest but used the knot to stimulate himself further.

The last round used all of Jongdae’s strength. A thrust sent him flat on the bed. Baekhyun choke don his breath when his knot got impossibly deep. Jongdae took him to the hilt accidentally. Jongdae wailed at the feeling. Baekhyun had one more to go before pulling out. He was so coated inside Jongdae, he felt some of his release dry on Jongdae’s backside already.

“A little more, love. Just a few more,” Baekhyun whispered to him while he used the other as he pleased. Jongdae nodded, screaming to his pillow while Baekhyun hit his spot on each time. His dick was about to explode beneath him because of Baekhyun’s weight. The alpha grunted after two jerks. Jongdae felt this last one the most. He felt his rim leaking already. Baekhyun screamed Jongdae’s name like a damn prayer. Jongdae came the hardest all night, soaking himself and the sheets as he squeezed himself dry. He thought his breathing would finally stop. The tightness around Baekhyun was too much that he felt his entire dick almost cut in half.

The alpha dropped on top of Jongdae’s scratched and clot-filled back. They panted hard while they wait for Baekhyun to pull out. The alpha pulled out and shakily ran to the bathroom. With a slight limp too. He got a damp washcloth and cleaned Jongdae.

The beta rest his cheek on his arm, watching the alpha move around to tend to him. He’d smile a bit when the other wobbled or winced. They’ll both have a hard time walking and sitting soon. Baekhyun even placed some ointment on Jongdae’s back for the scratches. Jongdae offered to put some on Baekhyun’s but the alpha declined shyly. The marks on him were far worse than Jongdae’s.

“Where are you going?” Jongdae asked sleepily.

“You need to stay hydrated, Jongdae. You cried so much.” Baekhyun kissed his forehead and left. When he came back, Jongdae was asleep. Baekhyun looked at the clock and slid in bed with him. They still had an hour or two before getting ready. Jongdae suddenly cuddled to him, head on his chest. Baekhyun couldn’t complain. He was too tired to.

* * *

Jongdae woke up because of his alarm. He reached over Baekhyun and hit snooze. He rolled over to his phone, feeling a slight buzz in his head. He sat up and checked his messages. Kyungsoo got home safe. School’s cancelled because of the storm so good for them, they could sleep in to the weekend. His mom wanted to have lunch with him...in this weather. Emails from different school organisations he came in. It was all good news. The one that laid on his bed wasn’t.

How were they going to tell Kyungsoo they slept together, that he took Baekhyun’s virginity? Jongdae looked behind to see Baekhyun awake and dazed as he looked at the rain pouring outside the window. Baekhyun saw him staring so he just waved at him sleepily. Jongdae couldn’t help but smile softly to him. He offered his hand to help him up. Baekhyun groaned, grumbling about the pain on his abs. Jongdae understood the feeling. The alpha rest his cheek on the beta’s shoulder and closed his eyes.

“What are we gonna tell Kyungsoo?” Baekhyun slurred.

“Does he have to know?” Jongdae asked. The alpha shook his head.

“We’re going to be late for class.”

“No, school’s cancelled. What do you want to do?” Jongdae ruffled his hair. Baekhyun shrugged, really tired.

Jongdae couldn’t sleep anymore. Body clock. So he laid Baekhyun down again and got dressed in a comfy shirt and pyjama bottoms to make breakfast. Baekhyun came out later, sad to be alone in bed, only wearing Jongdae’s other pyjama bottoms. Their clothes were in the washer already, together with Jongdae’s sheets.

Baekhyun rubbed his eye and looked over to what the other cooked. Ramyun. Of course, a staple for any struggling student. They were graduating high school soon so enjoying the last few moments with ramyun wouldn’t hurt. Baekhyun wrapped his arms around his best friend’s waist and rest his chin on his shoulder. Jongdae hummed a song while he waited for the noodles to cook.

“Ah don’t sing that!” Baekhyun hit his arm.

“Why not?” Jongdae pouted.

“That’s your ex’s favourite song, am I right?” Baekhyun put his hands on his waist. Jongdae nodded.

“You fuck me then sing your ex’s song. How rude, Kim Jongdae.” Baekhyun pouted. The beta pulled him by the waist and hugged him. “You still think you’re living with him. Why?” The alpha threw out some aegyo as he whined with a foot stomp.

“Sorry, I’m sorry. What do you want me to sing?” Jongdae smiled.

“No. I don’t want you to sing to make me feel better. Let’s visit Kyungsoo after breakfast. It’s better than you crying again. You’re so ugly when you cry.” Jongdae complied, releasing Baekhyun to do whatever he wanted. That’s a lie, of course, Baekhyun’s heart crumbled when Jongdae cried. Last night said it all.

They waited in front of Kyungsoo’s house with food. (The rain stopped, thank heavens.) Kyungsoo’s mother welcomed them nicely, hugging both guys. He sniffed their shirts and raised a brow. Baekhyun slightly caught what she smelled and started complimenting the plants while Jongdae went in first.

Kyungsoo looked so weirded out by having his friends over unexpectedly. What made it cringer was the two being extra clingy. He looked at his mother while she ironed. What did an overnight do to them? Kyungsoo ate quietly while the two fooled around. Typical setting. They watched a movie and made Jongdae promise to not cry over his ex-boyfriend ever again. Jongdae had to scream it at the rooftop to make it official. They went their separate ways full and happy.

Jongdae entered his apartment and sighed. It really was more fun with friends than being alone. Oddly, he didn’t let his mood dampen. He sat on the sofa and did some homework. He laid on his bed while a movie played on the TV in his room. His phone rang, waking him from his sleep.

“Hmm?” he answered, thinking it was Baekhyun. A chuckle made him sigh. “What do you want, Minseok?”

“I just…uh, how have you been?” A dumb question.

“Good, you?”

“Oh. So you’re really over us?” Minseok sounded embarrassed. Jongdae didn’t answer.

“Will that be all?” The beta really wasn’t in the mood to converse. His phone beeped. “Hold on, I got another call.”

“Kim Jongdae, what took you so long to answer? Are you on the line with someone else? What’s your answer on the 4th question, page 214?” Baekhyun.

Jongdae sat up and got his books from his backpack. He looked it over and explained the answer to Baekhyun. It took some time but Jongdae was more than happy to help.

“Okay, I understand it now. Thanks Jongdae! You can go back to the other call now. Tell whoever it was I’m sorry for taking an hour.” Baekhyun chuckled.

“What call?” Jongdae’s brows furrowed. Shit. Minseok.

When Jongdae got back to the other call, Minseok was still there. He sighed, blaming Jongdae for his phone bill for not coming back right away. Jongdae didn’t appreciate it.

“You could’ve hung up. It’s always an option, Minseok. Just like choosing an alpha over a beta.” He said bitterly and hung up.

He pinched his nose bridge and sighed. His phone pinged again. It was Baekhyun in their group chat. He shared a photo of him with his dog. Kyungsoo told him to sleep already but Jongdae stared at it. He stared at the empty space on his bed too. It’s weird how he missed Baekhyun beside him. He thought about it but pushed the idea away. They’d see each other tomorrow. Jongdae held on to that.

* * *

In the middle of class, Jongdae heaved dry. Kyungsoo and Baekhyun looked at him immediately. Suddenly, Jongdae ran out of the hall to discard his breakfast. He flushed the toilet and stayed on the floor, catching his breath. He’s fortunate enough to not stain his uniform with it. Kyungsoo entered the bathroom, knocking on the stall.

Jongdae couldn’t think. He felt a dull pain on his lower abdomen. It couldn’t be, right? Kyungsoo threatened to break the door if Jongdae didn’t open up. It couldn’t be, right?

“Is B—Are you alone, Kyungsoo?” Jongdae couldn’t breathe.

“Yes. Why?” Kyungsoo sounded so worried.

“Lock the door. Don’t let Baekhyun in.” Jongdae stood up, frazzled about the situation.

“Why? He’s on his way here.”

“Just do it!” Jongdae heard a faint click on the door so he came out, hand on his stomach. Kyungsoo looked at his best friend oddly.

“Are you okay?” Kyungsoo met his eyes. Jongdae winced, both hands on his stomach.

A strong knock made Jongdae flinch. He knew that scent. It’s Baekhyun. Kyungsoo’s brows furrowed, trying to understand.

“Jongdae, are you alright? Is Kyungsoo with you?” Baekhyun asked. Kyungsoo’s breathed in deeply, walking towards Jongdae. The scents intensified. He signalled Jongdae to stay silent.

“Yes, he’s fine. Just a bad breakfast.” Kyungsoo saved him.

“Oh. Well, I’ll go tell the teacher you sent him to the nurse’s office, okay?” Baekhyun’s tone was still cheery. Jongdae wished he was too.

At the nurse’s office, they ruled his stomach sickness with acid reflux. Jongdae thought it was weird because the pain was lower than his stomach. On his way out, he smuggled some medicines by the door and thanked the nurses for taking care of him. They gave him a blue lollipop. For good measure.

* * *

There were many dreams laid out in front of them. They always talked about how things would be in the future. Baekhyun was going to be a teacher. Jongdae was going to be a singer. Kyungsoo was going to be a nurse if not a doctor. They were ready to face everything once they entered college. It made them very proud of each other to be graduating together too. Their friendship was one of the best things they had and would never replaced it with anything.

The way they leaned on each other always helped them get through everything. They got in fights and almost jail because of defending each other. These memories always bound them to each other. Baekhyun broke his arm after getting bullied in middle school. Jongdae almost got expelled for beating up the person who did it. Kyungsoo was suspended for two weeks for hitting his classmate with a rock-filled sock after Jongdae’s status came out. The hyungs always protected Kyungsoo from sexual predators since he presented first. He was mistaken as an omega so many times, Baekhyun and Jongdae were too pleased to play alphas for him all the time. Even when Minseok came in, they were supportive. Even during the toughest moments, they knew they always would be to each other.

Kyungsoo just finished doing chores when his phone lit up. Seven missed calls from Jongdae always meant it was urgent. He told his mother he was going out for a bit. He rushed on his bike to his best friend immediately. At the stoplight, his phone rang again. He answered it quickly.

He went to Jongdae’s apartment faster, banging on the door once he got there. The building owner called him out for it and said his friend was about to commit suicide. It wasn’t true. He just wanted to open the door. The owner opened the door quickly with the spare key, letting Kyungsoo in.

Once the owner left them, Kyungsoo had to think of the setting in front of him. Jongdae laid on the floor, a paper by his hand. “What happens now?” Jongdae sighed. “What about my auditions? How could I be so stupid?”

Kyungsoo walked around him, seeing a hospital seal on the paper. The evidences laid on the coffee table. “It’s impossible. Why do I have to be so special? I hate being special. Did he fuck me that hard? What am I going to do Kyungsoo?” Jongdae was about to cry again. Emotions became him since Minseok. It was really unsettling. Kyungsoo knelt beside him combing his hair after reading everything.

“You’re going to tell me who the father is, that’s what you’ll do.” Kyungsoo said sternly. Jongdae gulped.

Kyungsoo laid on his stomach on the floor, cursing the wood. Jongdae now knelt beside him, ruffling his hair, apologising.

“You asked him to stay behind that night. You kept looking at him that night. You were flirting over dinner, I remember that. After that, you two were so close when we cleaned. How did this happen? How did I not see it? Mom said you smelled the same. I didn’t believe her. Fuck, fuck, fuck, this can’t be happening.” Kyungsoo muttered to himself, to the floor. “You fucked Baekhyun, Jongdae! He fucked you! You’re pregnant with Baekhyun’s child! Holy shit, that’s so fucked up, Jongdae!” Kyungsoo screamed as he rolled over to face the ceiling.

“Please tell me I’m dreaming. Please, you’re joking right? Come out, Baekhyun! It’s not funny!” Kyungsoo rubbed his temples, very exasperated by the turn of events.

Jongdae closed his eyes, thinking of a way to console him. Kyungsoo laughed hysterically, willing himself that it was a joke. Jongdae didn’t laugh. He just looked…lost. Kyungsoo shut up when he saw how troubled the other was. It may be unfortunate for Kyungsoo to be dealing with this but Jongdae’s going through worse. He’s got the evidence in him. Kyungsoo sat up and placed a hand on his shoulder.

Reality hit them both hard but in different ways. If Kyungsoo thought it was horrible he had to deal with his best friends becoming fathers, Jongdae had to think of his entire life. Everything was going to change. He was carrying a pup, one that he had to raise while studying. He thought about delaying until it was born but didn’t want that to be in his way. One thing was sure, his dream of being a singer was over. Jongdae smiled a bit, even laughing at the situation.

“Does Baekhyun know?” Kyungsoo whispered. Jongdae shook his head. “You have to tell him, Jongdae. He deserves to know.”

“No. He doesn’t. I can’t ruin his future too because of my fault.” Jongdae’s hands turned into fists on his lap. “This is all my fault. I should’ve stopped when he told me to. How could I trust education when the slightest chances keep happening? There’s nothing I can do but face this.”

“But you don’t have to face it alone. You need Baekhyun.” Kyungsoo reasoned.

“I don’t, Kyungsoo. Can you give it a rest?” Jongdae got up and opened a bottle of beer. Kyungsoo took it away immediately. That’s unhealthy for the pup.

“What are you so afraid of, Jongdae? It’s not ruining your friendship, our friendship, because that should’ve been your first concern when you two started making out. It’s not Baekhyun’s future either, I’m sure of it.” Kyungsoo was too smart for his age.

“We just fucked, Kyungsoo! Do you see any marks on me? We didn’t claim each other! He can still choose someone else, a better mate, a real one he could claim. He can fuck all the omegas and betas he wants. Why would I hold him down for this? Because it’s his? It can be anyone’s, you know. I may have whored around without you guys knowing!” Jongdae breathed heavily.

“You think he doesn’t love you, Jongdae? You think Baekhyun would help you, comfort you, fuck Jongdae, you took away his virginity with his permission. How could you say he doesn’t love you?” Kyungsoo wanted to punch him so bad. Baekhyun was many things but ingenuine.

“Do you think he’d welcome the thought of having a bastard child? One from his best friend? He didn’t have feelings that night, Kyungsoo. I’m sure of it. He’s just going to leave with the next best find.”

“Like you did? Jongdae, I see what you’re so scared of but I’m sure Baekhyun is not Minseok.” Kyungsoo peeked at his face.

“Can you stop saying his name? I said he doesn’t need to know!” Jongdae screamed. The younger was exasperated. “Tell me if—if it’s possible. I’m giving up my dreams for this. I’ll—I’ll have to be good at something else other than singing, right? I’m going to move back with my parents until this is born. I’ll raise this myself. I can do it. I technically raised Baekhyun, so what’s the problem with another version of him? My parents were nice enough to at least accept this. I should too, so I’m not aborting this.”

Kyungsoo was horrified Jongdae thought about doing that. He hugged Jongdae tightly. The fact the other thought this far made him respect him so much.

“Sorry Kyungsoo, but I’m not going with you guys to college. Not our dream one at least,” Jongdae whispered. Kyungsoo had to stomach this decision. He knew it was tough for Jongdae to make it but he found his hyung to be so brave to put this pup first.

“I understand,” Kyungsoo sighed, trying not to be too disappointed. “But you have to tell Baekhyun why you’re changing your mind.” Jongdae nodded, knowing he had to at least do that.

Jongdae didn’t tell the entirety of his plan. He just said what needs to be known, like he got accepted in other colleges. Baekhyun brushed it off, sure that Jongdae wouldn’t apply there. Jongdae gave Kyungsoo another phone number to contact him once he left. He promised Kyungsoo that he’ll give one to Baekhyun too when they talked. But Jongdae was full of secrets now, and he never did. Kyungsoo knew and felt that just by looking at his guarded eyes. Whatever Jongdae planned, Kyungsoo just trusted him with it.

* * *

Graduation day came and everything seemed normal. Kyungsoo and Jongdae tried to be. Baekhyun ran to them, happy that high school’s over. Baekhyun started rambling about how awesome college would be and how amazing he was going with his best friends. Jongdae just kept nodding, smiling at him. Kyungsoo kept Baekhyun in check, always cutting his outrageous ideas.

Their parents took photos of them doing the craziest poses, smiling brightly, welcoming the future. Kyungsoo took photos with each of them. Baekhyun jumped on his back, making the other frown. Kyungsoo hit Baekhyun with the scroll. Baekhyun took selfies with his salutatorian medal while Jongdae just stood back and watched. Baekhyun saw him and pulled him in the photo.

“Why aren’t you joining my photos? Are you going to cry, Kim Jongdae?” Baekhyun mocked. Jongdae pinched his side and smiled for the camera. Kyungsoo wanted to look away once he saw Jongdae’s eyes glisten. Baekhyun’s parents took photos of them. Kyungsoo turned away to look at the sky.

Baekhyun stood beside Jongdae with a peace sign. Jongdae copied it and smiled. He looped his arms around Jongdae’s arm and rest his head on his shoulder. Jongdae still smiled while he looked at his best friend lovingly. Jongdae couldn’t express how proud he was of Baekhyun for finishing 2nd in high school. He supplied him 70% of the answers all the time but the alpha always aced his exams even if he slept through it. Jongdae would never understand that skill but still proud nonetheless. Baekhyun moved Jongdae in front of him and hugged him from behind. Jongdae gasped when Baekhyun’s hands rest on his belly.

His turned his face to look at Baekhyun. The alpha looked at him with a huge smile on his face. Jongdae was going to miss that the most, probably. He couldn’t take it anymore. Jongdae turned in Baekhyun’s arms and hugged him tight. It took Baekhyun by surprise.

“Thank you, Baekhyun, for giving me the best time of my life.” Jongdae whispered to him. Baekhyun hugged him back, nodding at the words.

“I should be thank you for helping me graduate. You’re always supporting me even if we get in trouble. I promise to be the best teacher, Jongdae. You can count on that.” Baekhyun giggled.

“You should, okay? With or without me, you should.” Jongdae cupped his face, memorizing his features.

“Why, why do you sound like you’re saying goodbye?” Baekhyun tried to look for something desperately in Jongdae’s eyes. “We’re still going to college together.” Jongdae just smiled weakly.

They walked around the halls one last time. Kyungsoo didn’t mind he had to stay behind them. Jongdae didn’t want to let go of Baekhyun’s hand. They laughed at the memories they had in certain places. It was a fun walk, they thought. Baekhyun promised that they’d make better memories in the new campus. Kyungsoo hugged Jongdae from behind. Both friends held him tightly but for different reasons.

“I’m gonna go first. My dad wants to be early for dinner reservations.” Kyungsoo announced. Baekhyun joked about joining them. Jongdae ruffled his hair and smiled. Kyungsoo was sure he’d see his hyung again. He gave his number. But maybe not like this anymore.

Once Baekhyun and Jongdae were alone. They went to the bench they stayed often. Jongdae smiled at the sky while Baekhyun looked at him and kissed his cheek.

“What was that for?” Jongdae touched his cheek, also ready to punch the other’s arm.

“Thank you, Kim Jongdae. I don’t know what I’d be without you. At least someone in the world likes me.”

“What are you saying? Kyungsoo likes you too. With or without me, people will still fall for you, Baekhyun. You charm your way into everything.” Jongdae scoffed.

“Do you think someone will fall for me?” Baekhyun worried, being the only one who didn’t have a relationship experience, the one who felt like no one cared for him deeply. A stupid one in fact because the person beside him already did.

“Someone always does. You just don’t notice it because of your games. Just open your eyes, Baek. Be ready to love whoever that is, okay?” Jongdae pinched his cheek.

“You should know someone loves you too, Jongdae. It’s been tough since Minseok but I’m sure someone also loves you, maybe even more than Minseok did.” Baekhyun winked. _Oh my god, where’s Kyungsoo when he’s needed?_

Jongdae chuckled and bumped his shoulder. Baekhyun stood up and stretched. He offered his hand with a peaceful smile. Jongdae took it, making sure his fingers were between Baekhyun’s. The alpha tugged him forward, kissing him square on the lips. Jongdae saw Baekhyun’s eyes close slowly. He gave in. For one last time, he wanted to feel this. No one had to say it. This kiss said everything. The someone they referred to was each other. Jongdae just wished he realised sooner.

* * *

Jongdae’s secrets were slowly coming out one by one. Baekhyun just received the confirmation letter about their dormitory details. He called Kyungsoo, asking if Jongdae filed it right.

“Did he forget his own name? It’s only us here. I’ll go to the campus to have this changed.” Baekhyun asked, shrugging his jacket on. Kyungsoo stopped him with a sigh. That’s unusual. The youngest would just hum in agreement when Baekhyun mumbled his decisions. The sigh was filled with heaviness. Baekhyun felt his chest hollowed. “Soo-ya, what are you not telling me?”

Baekhyun ran as fast as he could, ignoring the building owner’s greeting. He couldn’t believe it. Jongdae wasn’t picking up. The elevator doors opened so he ran to Jongdae’s apartment. He knocked many times but no one answered. He jiggled the doorknob, noticing it was open after all. When he entered room, it was empty. The shelves were clean, furniture covered. Not even the usual smell of lilies remained. It’s as if Jongdae was never there.

“E-Excuse me, why is apartment 21 empty?” Baekhyun asked the owner, very in distraught.

“Ah, you must be Baekhyun, then. He’s right, you do have the face of an idol.” The ahjumma smiled, holding his hand. Baekhyun nodded, bowing humbly. “Jongdae left this for you. He said he’s sorry he couldn’t give this back personally. He already left, son, two weeks ago.”

Baekhyun sat on his bedroom floor with his legs crossed. In front him laid the things Jongdae left. He stared at the clothes Jongdae left for him. It was the clothes he wore when he lost his virginity to him. On top of the folded clothes was a blue lollipop. Baekhyun stared at it, thinking where his best friend went. Why didn’t he say anything? He called Jongdae’s parents but they didn’t give much except that Jongdae had plans he never told anyone, that it’s best for all of them to respect his wishes and hope for the best in his journey. He called Jongdeok, Jongdae’s brother, but had the same answers. It’s getting pointless to even try to find him. No one gave a clear answer. Jongdae wasn’t even picking up. Baekhyun checked if the number was still active at the service provider’s help desk but they said it wasn’t anymore. Baekhyun was running out of options.

He got the lollipop and ate it in frustration. He bit it until it crushed. He was pissed with Jongdae. All their plans were suddenly different. What Baekhyun hated the most was that Jongdae decided for himself. That anger slowly turned into sadness, emptiness. He wore those clothes to at least make him feel like Jongdae’s still around and went to sleep. When his parents found him, Baekhyun was sick, dehydrated, and murmured one thing only: Jongdae.

Jongdae’s mom sighed when she saw his son watching the sunset from the roofdeck of their house. He hummed a song, letting the wind touch his skin. She went closer, putting a phone near his hand. Jongdae sat stiffly, jaw tightening. “Call Baekhyun. Please tell him. He’s been calling everyday, Jongdae. I don’t know how we can hide this anymore. You can’t just stay with us forever.” She pleaded.

“I’ll be gone once this is born, Mom.” He kept it at that and left. Jongdae didn’t eat dinner every time Baekhyun called. He’d lock himself in his room and close his eyes, attempting to hold his breath. It’s a subtle way to end things, he thought, but the baby kicked him to snap out of it. One time he did it, the baby kicked so hard, he clutched his stomach in pain. “Baekhyun, quit it!” He groaned. The realisation hit him. Baekhyun wasn’t there. It wasn’t him. The first tear since he left finally came out. It’s been flowing out of him since then.

* * *

**4 years later…**

 

Jongdae just finished throwing the trash so everything’s clean. Kyungsoo just finished loading the dishes in the dryer so everything’s back to normal. Throwing a birthday party for a 4-year old was tough. Jongdae’s thankful for Kyungsoo, for being the best uncle for Daeul. Since Jongdae’s pregnancy, Kyungsoo’s been the right hand man. Even this birthday party was his idea.

“Will you be alright?” Kyungsoo rubbed his best friend’s shoulders. Jongdae nodded, thanking him after.

Once the doors were locked and the lights were off, Jongdae yawned and made his way to his bedroom. He flopped down on the bed, face first. A tug on his pants woke him slightly. He didn’t realise he dozed off right away.

Jongdae looked by his feet. Daeul. “Hey buddy, got nightmares again?” He asked, pulling Daeul up to bed with him. The little guy nodded, hiccupping his sobs. Jongdae kissed his rosy cheek, assuring the child that it wasn’t real. Eventually, the child fell asleep in Jongdae’s arms.

How quick time flew, Jongdae thought. Daeul was simply a pup but now he’s almost potty trained, brushing his own teeth, and even washing his own plate and cup. He’ll be going to preschool soon. Jongdae sighed, running his fingers in his dark son’s hair. Even though he was an accident, he wouldn’t trade him for the world. It wasn’t easy juggling college and a baby boy but Jongdae managed. He’s got his degree, a very good job, and a stable income. All of it seemed worth it just by looking at how healthy Daeul was.

_“Okay, how’s this?” Jongdae smiled nervously to Kyungsoo as he tried to carry 1-year old Daeul. It looked he carried a box of groceries. Kyungsoo looked so unimpressed and horrified, he got the child from his father._

_“You’re going to give him scoliosis before he even learns how to walk. Take care of his spine!”_

_“I don’t know how to do this, Kyungsoo. Oh my god, I’m going to fail as a father too. Haven’t I failed enough at being a best friend?” Jongdae dropped to the floor, staring into nothingness._

_“Just call Baekhyun and tell him he’s a father. That’s what you did to me.” Kyungsoo smiled, but to the child, not the father of the child. “He has Baekhyun’s brows! You’re so dead, Jongdae.”_

_“Don’t say that. I love Daeul’s brows.” Jongdae frowned._

_“You loved that about Baekhyun too,” Kyungsoo began to pity him so placed Daeul on Jongdae’s chest._

_Jongdae immediately wrapped his hands around his son’s torso and smiled. Daeul sneezed adorably. Jongdae laughed heartily, placing a kiss on his droopy cheek. Kyungsoo softened at the sight. If only Baekhyun was here to see this. It wouldn’t be so hard to watch._

_There were times where Jongdae really just tried to wing it. Jongdae finally got to his bed after putting Daeul to bed for the 3rd time. Just when he’s about to close his eyes, the crying erupted again. He buried his head under the pillows to curse the person who got him pregnant._

_The struggle didn’t end there. Jongdae had a hard time feeding him because he spat everything out. Jongdae probably ate more of the baby food than his son. Bathing a baby always made Jongdae nervous. He wondered what if Daeul’s skull would crack open or he drowned in the mini tub. So to quicken the process, Jongdae would prepare a mixture of water and soap beside the tub and just pour it over Daeul then rinse. No one would get hurt or die in that process, he thought._

_“You have got to be kidding me.” Kyungsoo arrived. “You’ve been bathing him like that since bringing him home?”_

_“Yes, why? What’s wrong with it? He’s clean either way.” Jongdae wrapped a crying Daeul in the same towel he used for himself._

_“He’s a baby, Jongdae. Not you.” Kyungsoo looked around the apartment. “Are you raising a pet or a child? Where are his toys?” Kyungsoo looked like he was having a mental breakdown._

_“Do I have to buy for him too? I thought that’s what birthdays and Christmas were for?” Kyungsoo thought he was kidding. Nope. Jongdae’s serious._

_“With or without a mate, you are hopeless, Jongdae.” Kyungsoo got Daeul from him and the child immediately shut up. “Let’s get you cleaned, baby. We’re going to buy you toys using daddy’s money, okay?” Kyungsoo spoke cutely. “You. Worthless trash. Get ready too. You’re driving us.” Nevermind, Uncle Deathsoo’s back._

_A two-year old was Jongdae’s worst nightmare. Teaching Daeul to walk was the proudest moment of his life so far. Learning he was a fast runner was the downside. Good thing he was athletic or else Daeul would be a resident patient in the hospital. He’s learned to baby-proof everything; from corners of furniture, utensils, to the dangerous areas for toddlers. Jongdae was getting the hang of it._

_He even enjoyed Daeul’s adorable grunts when he had to poop. Daeul understood many things already at a young age. He knew when his father mocked him, laughed at him, and even cared for him. Lucky for Jongdae, Daeul wasn’t a difficult pup to raise. The child had his tantrums but that was normal. It was always funny when Jongdae and Daeul’s tantrums erupted at the same time._

_“Appa!” Daeul threw his crackers on the floor to get his attention._

_“Ah why’d you do that, Daeul-ah? You won’t have enough for the rest of the month!” Jongdae picked them up hesitantly. When he faced Daeul, he was met with a shower of juice from the child’s mouth. Daeul giggled, squealing in delight. Jongdae threw the crackers and drank his water. He met the kid’s eyes sternly then sprayed his drink to his face. Now Jongdae chuckled while Daeul pouted as he wiped his eyes._

_“It doesn’t feel great, huh?” Jongdae stuck his tongue out. Daeul did too. Suddenly, his cup went flying to Jongdae, spilling the juice all over his face. Jongdae huffed a breath and threw his water to Daeul’s face. The child looked like he drowned. Daeul started coughing. Jongdae took notice, wiping the child’s wet face quickly then picked him up to pat his back. He began peppering the little pup with kisses and apologies._

_“Sorry, baby, forgive appa, Daeul-ah, ah jebal,” Jongdae pouted, imitating his son. “You threw your crackers so appa got upset. Don’t throw them anymore, okay? Just say no-no if you don’t want them anymore, okay?” Jongdae tried to teach him. Daeul nodded, wiping his eyes. “Aigoo, you’re so cute.”_

_The father and son duo sat on the sofa, watching cartoons. It was a rerun of old cartoons like Dora the Explorer. Daeul watched but wasn’t really interested. Jongdae had a beer bottle on his right hand while Daeul had his baby bottle on his left. it’s a man’s world, indeed._

_“It’s just behind you,” Jongdae mumbled. “It’s there! Just turn your chubby neck, Dora!” He screamed. Daeul flinched at the sound. “Aigoo, sorry Daeul-ah. You’re not enjoying this?” He rubbed Daeul’s chest to soothe the quick heartbeat._

_“No-no,” Daeul mumbled with his signature pout. Jongdae changed the channel to Tom and Jerry. After one hit on Tom, Daeul laughed. Jongdae watched his son enjoy violence. “As expected, you’ll be an alpha like your father.” The two-year old pup tipped to the side, still laughing. Jongdae smiled, letting him die with laughter. It’s moments like these that Jongdae always remembered why he wanted to keep Daeul. It wasn’t for him, or Baekhyun, it was for the pup himself, so he could smile and laugh at life._

_The pregnancy made Jongdae discover many things about himself. He had to fake his status about being an omega to avoid speculations of a pregnant male beta. He was part of the 0.01% of the probability. Jongdae made sure to disprove science from now on._

_He went to baby stores for some items for the baby’s birth. Female omegas greeted him, asking him when was he due and all. Jongdae felt like he just entered a book club with the amount of smiles and questions. He really didn’t know what the pup would like so he kept whispering to his bump if one was better than the other. Thankfully, Daeul kicked if he liked something. That helped Jongdae a lot._

_There were many times Jongdae had to be alone with his bump. He’d sing to it, make jokes with it, even draw on it. He’d send photos them to Kyungsoo when he’s bored. Luckily, the other didn’t get annoyed. He always said he’s happy Jongdae’s enjoying this. And Jongdae did._

_Hormones were different when pregnant. His mood swings were an all time high one night, crying over a carpet because it was so ugly. He was frustrated over a receipt that wasn’t printed properly. Worst of all, he felt sorry for his bump, his pup. He cried about missing Baekhyun, wishing he was there, wishing he could call him and tell the truth. The pup got stressed hearing him cry. This landed him in the hospital for a miscarriage scare. Kyungsoo came with him, praying it wasn’t as bad as that._

_Jongdae cried for weeks about being a horrible father. Kyungsoo turned his phone off because of the amount of messages. Turned out, Jongdae just needed to keep quiet and listen to his bump. Slowly, he smiled again. The pup connected with him, like it sent him encouragement to keep going. Jongdae felt closer to his son the closer his due date came._

No matter how many times Daeul and Jongdae whined against each other, and how many times Kyungsoo undermined him for being a father, Jongdae would never deny that he loved Daeul. He’s given many things to the boy since he was made and he’ll continue to give anything he could. All except one. His father.

“Daeul-ah, will you ever forgive Appa?” Jongdae whispered, eyes adoring his sleeping son. “The both of us,” He swallowed a threatening lump on his throat. “I’m sorry. He’s…not around like your friends’ dads. I just can’t find him anymore.” His heart couldn’t bring himself to find happiness again because of this secret he’s carried. Though Daeul came out four years ago, the secret’s been in him longer than that. It’s the hardest thing he’s had to push out.

* * *

The Kim father and son duo took a trip in the supermarket one afternoon. Jongdae dressed Daeul in shorts, a dinosaur shirt, and a hoodie with Daeul’s favourite light-up shoes. Jongdae let him run around within sight while he picked some vegetables.

“Oh! What a cute kid! What’s your name?” someone talked to Daeul. Jongdae took notice, calling the child over. The person turned, stunning them both. “Jongdae? He’s with you?” Crap, it’s Minseok.

“Ah, yes. Daeul-ah, say hi.” Jongdae tapped his shoulder lightly. Daeul bowed, murmuring a soft annyeong. That’s all he could say. The whole thing was still in progress.

“Ah he’s adorable! He looks just like you. Where’s your mate?” Minseok looked around.

“Busy. It’s just us. We just moved back in the area.” Jongdae gave Daeul a high-five but the child shook his head. Minseok smiled.

“Really? Ah yes, I heard you went to college back home. It’s good to see you happy, Jongdae.”

“How are you and that person you were with? What’s his name again?” Jongdae really didn’t know his name.

“At home. We’re expecting.” Minseok rubbed his belly. Still no name then?

“Oh, really? Congratulations! Daeul-ah, there’s a pup inside, Uncle Minseok.” Jongdae squatted and sat Daeul on his knee. Daeul placed his hand on Minseok’s belly, smiling when he felt something.

“You don’t have to tell him that, Jongdae. After what I did to you, you’d still let him call me uncle?” Minseok felt embarrassed.

“Of course. Because of you, I wouldn’t have this little rascal.” Jongdae ruffled Daeul’s hair. Minseok nodded in understanding. “We’ll see you around, yeah?” The two ex-lovers shook hands while Daeul waved goodbye. Jongdae sighed once it was over. That was all the closure he needed after all. Still, it felt odd being more comfortable talking to Minseok than Baekhyun.

* * *

Daeul’s first day in preschool was really fun. Jongdae couldn’t stop taking photos of his son in a school uniform even if it wasn’t uniform day. The blue sailor type of uniform just fit his son so well. Jongdae even bought him new school shoes for it. Daeul was getting cranky already, pouting again. Jongdae sent about 32 photos to Kyungsoo. He was so sick of it he said he would send the next one to Baekhyun if he sent another one. Jongdae stopped there, just for good measure.

The day before, Jongdae let Daeul pick whatever snacks he wanted in his new lunchbox. To his surprise, his son got animal cheese crackers, fruits, and his favourite juice pouch. That’s it. He didn’t want candies or chocolates. Jongdae was pleased with his son’s choices.

So that’s what he had packed for the first day of school; Onesie day. Out of all the onesies in Daeul’s closet, he picked one that made his dad soften. Since Daeul could mostly dress himself already, Jongdae waited in the kitchen, sorting the fridge with their dinner for tonight.

“Appa, let’s go!” Daeul called with a huge smile on his face that was covered with the hood of his onesie. He’s lost two of his teeth already so it only made him cuter.

“Oh, where’s Daeul-ah?” Jongdae pretended to look around.

“Here!” Daeul jumped up and down. Jongdae still kept looking around him. Daeul took the hood off, arms flailing.

“There you are! Whoa please don’t eat me, Mr. Dinosaur.” Jongdae shielded himself. His son gave the biggest roar he could manage as he pounced on his dad. Jongdae fell to the ground with him, laughing with his son. He combed Daeul’s hair with his fingers. Daeul looked at Jongdae’s tie and frowned.

“Appa, don’t work too hard. Come home early for dinner, okay?” Daeul spoke slowly, trying to get the words right as he straightened the knot on his father’s tie. Jongdae stared in awe. Where did he learn this? When did he learn this?

“Yes, I will pick you up later so we can have dinner together, okay?” Jongdae kissed his forehead and helped him stand. Daeul tried to pull his dad up, using all his strength. Jongdae couldn’t be more proud of his kind son.

They went out the door hand in hand. They greeted their neighbours in the elevator then went to the car parked in the garage. Jongdae’s parents never left him even with Daeul. They gave him everything to help their son raise a pup alone. There were some things Jongdae didn’t want help with so his parents understood. This car, however, was their graduation gift for him and Daeul. He would always be forever grateful for them. They didn’t press further for him to tell Baekhyun the truth and promised it would be their secret. As if they could tell Baekhyun. They lost contact with him a long time ago.

Jongdae knelt on the ground to bid his son goodbye at the entrance of the preschool. They hyped each other up, exchanging hwaitings and smiles, and hugged each other. Jongdae reminded him to be kind and friendly, to share his snacks when he could, and be polite. Daeul nodded, holding his pinky out in promise. His son reminded him to not work too hard and to pick him up afterwards. Jongdae laughed at his son’s demand and promised too.

Daeul was escorted inside. Jongdae felt what his parents felt when they sent him off to another city for high school. It was heavy but at the same time accomplishing. Daeul looked back to his dad and waved. Jongdae did too, holding his pinky up afterwards. Daeul went in the room with a kind smile. Jongdae was suddenly reminded of his own lip curl. “I hope you find your Baekhyun in there, Daeul-ah.”

* * *

True to his promise, Jongdae always made sure to pick up Daeul after school. He would be there exactly at dismissal time or five minutes earlier. Daeul always ran to his dad with a huge smile on his face. Jongdae always welcomed him with a hug and a fist bump. They would go to the car singing whatever new nursery rhyme Daeul learned. In the car, Daeul would try his best to tell Jongdae his day while he ate any remainder of his snacks. Jongdae always listened, even when Daeul was upset when things didn’t go right sometimes. No matter how hard a day went for Jongdae, he worked hard but not too much for Daeul. A promise he had to keep.

There were homework nights for Daeul. Jongdae watched or read something while his son worked. Daeul would scratch his head with his pencil or crayon when he had a hard time. Jongdae would take notice immediately and help him. He’d read the instructions and even demonstrate what to do. Daeul’s art projects were also made by Jongdae. It always left them showering together because of the paint all over their arms. Daeul wouldn’t trade those memories for anything. He loved his dad too much to disappoint him.

At the same time, Daeul kept his promise. He was a great student and friend. When Jongdae dropped him off to school, someone always said hi to him. He also greeted teachers when they passed by. One time at the mall, Daeul recognised one of his teachers. He broke free from Jongdae and ran to her to greet and bow. Jongdae ran after him, apologising.

“Daeul-ah! It’s nice to see you out of school. You must be his dad.” Daeul’s female teacher bowed to Jongdae.

“Ah, yes. Good afternoon,” He smiled kindly.

“You should be proud of you son, Mr. Kim. He’s doing really well in school and is always kind to his classmates. Many of his teachers are fond of him.” She complimented.

“That’s good to hear.” Daeul tugged Jongdae’s shirt for a fist bump. Jongdae smiled, complying. The teacher laughed. “It was nice meeting you, Mr. Kim. Daeul-ah, see you on Monday!”

“Yes, teacher!” Daeul smiled, holding Jongdae’s hand again. “Appa, it’s Uncle Soo!”

“Oh, go say hi to him.” Jongdae patted his butt to run.

Kyungsoo’s eyes widened when he saw Daeul. He knelt in front of him, asking where his dad was. Daeul pointed to Jongdae, who just waved from a few meters away. Kyungsoo looked so panicked. Jongdae raised a brow at whatever he mouthed. Daeul looked at his dad to come over but Kyungsoo told him to stay where he was. Who would he listen to? Kyungsoo kept mouthing something while Daeul screamed for Jongdae to come over. Suddenly, Kyungsoo looked to where his name was called. Jongdae looked at the person, panicking too. Daeul had to get away from his uncle quickly. Because Baekhyun was coming.

Jongdae signalled for Daeul to come over instead. Fortunately, the boy followed. Jongdae got his hand and pulled him to another direction.

“Who was that?” Baekhyun, wearing form-fitting jeans and a fine coat, asked Kyungsoo. He also sported a light brown hair color too.

“He was lost. His parents found him already.” Kyungsoo lied. Baekhyun nodded, walking to somewhere already. Kyungsoo looked back at Jongdae. He picked up his son and ran away. Kyungsoo still wished he would just tell Baekhyun already. Another mishap like this would stress the child in the future.

* * *

Daeul slept early because he was sick. Kyungsoo came over to have a drink with Jongdae. He also needed to check on Daeul in case. As dreamt of earlier, Kyungsoo was currently a nurse, on his way to being a doctor. He was assigned to the newborn pups because he was a beta. It was alright because he was planning on taking Pediatrics in the future. Daeul inspired him to.

“The other day was a close call. Are you still going to torture me? Baekhyun’s been doing it for the past four years, you know. Where’s Jongdae? Have you heard anything from Jongdae? Let’s find Jongdae.” Kyungsoo imitated Baekhyun. “Yeah, go find him. He’s just near your apartment.” Kyungsoo rolled his eyes.

“He is?” Jongdae raised a brow.

“You know The 4th tower? It’s near here.” Kyungsoo tried to remember.

“Oh, that is pretty near. We’ll have to hide harder.”

“Why did you move back? It’s the dumbest thing you thought of, Jongdae.” Kyungsoo sighed.

“My job. The marketing firm offered the highest empty position and it happened to be here. It pays good, keeps bills paid, Daeul’s in school, we’re eating well. Anything to keep us alive, I guess.” Jongdae shrugged.

“You could’ve been better off since the beginning with Baekhyun. It wouldn’t be so hard.” Jongdae agreed with Kyungsoo. He knew that with all his heart.

“How is he?”

Kyungsoo thought his ears heard wrong. Jongdae was finally asking how Baekhyun was. Usually he would just change the topic. Maybe seeing him at the mall after four years changed something in him.

Baekhyun was doing okay in college. But he and Kyungsoo fought a lot after living together for a term. Baekhyun moved out when his parents bought him his own place. Kyungsoo thought it was a good idea too. They didn’t speak until Baekhyun announced he was switching colleges. He said it wasn’t because of Kyungsoo but the education program in the other college was better. Kyungsoo knew it was more than that because everything in this campus felt lacking for Baekhyun. This school was his and Jongdae’s dream school. With Jongdae gone, the dream was no longer alive. It just mocked him.

They all graduated at the same time. Baekhyun worked hours to make sure he caught up in his new school. He always called Kyungsoo to talk and hang out but he really changed. This Baekhyun was careful with his words and actions. When Kyungsoo asked why he changed, he only smiled sadly. Later on, Baekhyun told why.

“I promised Jongdae I would be a good teacher with or without him. I think I get it now. I asked him why he sounded like he was saying goodbye that day, you know. I should’ve opened my eyes more because he really did.” Baekhyun sighed.

Kyungsoo wanted to scream to him where Jongdae was out of pity. It’s been like that for two years. After that, Baekhyun lightened up slightly. They barely spoke about Jongdae so it was easier for Kyungsoo to tolerate.

“Is—is he mated?” Jongdae didn’t look at Kyungsoo.

“What do you think?” The younger tried to hide his smile.

“I stalk his SNS. He’s got one tall mate.” Jongdae scrolled on his phone to show Kyungsoo, who just scoffed.

“Chanyeol? No, he’s not his mate. That’s his college buddy.” Kyungsoo clarified.

“So they fuck.” Kyungsoo spat his beer at his crudeness.

“Fuck no. Chanyeol’s mated and claimed. What are you thinking? Anything to make your life miserable, huh? As if you don’t fuck anyone once Daeul’s asleep.”

“I don’t. It’s just this hand and me.” Jongdae smirked at his right hand.

“You’re kidding.” But Jongdae wasn’t.

“Nope. Baekhyun pretty much ruined me the night we made Daeul.”

Kyungsoo got up covering his ears, screaming for Jongdae to shut up. Jongdae laughed, watching his friend suffer. Apparently, Baekhyun did the same to him before. Poor Kyungsoo; always the equaliser.

“Can beer drown my brain if I let it pass through my ears?” Kyungsoo tilted his head, about to pour beer in his ear. Jongdae threw him a peanut for fun. They laughed at different stories, trying hard not to wake Daeul. Eventually, Kyungsoo called it a night, hugging Jongdae. As usual, he left with urging Jongdae to call Baekhyun already. As usual, he didn’t.

* * *

Baekhyun just finished checking artworks so he got up to take a walk. He was surprised to see a child still in the premises. The sun was close to setting. He waited for his parent to fetch him by the benches. He didn’t cry but just sat patiently. His blue backpack was beside him while he ate his biscuits.

“Hi, is your mother coming to pick you up?” Baekhyun sat beside him.

“No. I don’t have a mom, just a dad.” The kid let his feet sway while he picked another biscuit from his animal pack. Baekhyun watched him, seeing he left most of the dinosaur ones untouched.

“You don’t like dinosaurs?” Baekhyun pointed.

“I do. It’s Appa, so he goes last. Do you want, teacher?” the kid offered. Baekhyun declined kindly, looking at the kid’s distinct eyes.

“You know, I have a friend that’s like you. He doesn’t eat the dinosaurs first because it looked like him. Roar!” Baekhyun pretended to claw him. The kid giggled.

“Appa looks like a dinosaur!”

“Really? Maybe that’s why he’s late. He’s out of time.” Baekhyun chuckled. He then realised his joke was meant for older people.

“Appa’s late because he had to finish his meeting. I understand. That’s why he packed extra biscuits and juice.” The kid smiled. Baekhyun ruffled his hair, adoring the child without his two front teeth.

“What’s your name?” He mumbled cutely.

“Kim…,”

“Daeul-ah! Appa’s here!”

The two looked by the entrance of the preschool. Daeul got his backpack and ran to his father. His father hugged him, showering him with head kisses, apologising for being late. He carried Daeul in his arms, pouting for being late. Daeul smiled, feeding his father biscuits once they were together. Once the kid was back on his feet, his father slung his backpack over his shoulder as he held his hand.

Baekhyun stood up slowly, mouth agape. His beady eyes seemed to be playing tricks on him. Daeul noticed him so he waved with a happy ‘goodbye, teacher’ from his lips. Baekhyun smiled a bit. “J-Jongdae?”

Their eyes met after a long time but the emotions were different. It was too different. Jongdae’s grip on Daeul tightened as Baekhyun came closer.

“Oh my god, is that you, Jongdae?” Baekhyun beamed, running fast. Jongdae wanted to run too but he was frozen. Daeul just looked and continued to chew his biscuits.

Suddenly, Jongdae was enveloped in a warm embrace. The crash came along with the memories. Daeul let go of Jongdae’s hand, staring at them in awe. Jongdae willed himself not to breathe. The scent would just make him sick. _Or fall in love again._

“I’ve been looking for you for so long. Where have you been? When did you come back?” Baekhyun’s questions felt like punches. “Is—is he your son?”

“Yes,” Jongdae surprised himself with his even voice. He might as well roll with it. “Baekhyun, this is Daeul. Daeul, he’s Baekhyun...sshi. We were friends since high school.” Daeul slid his hand in Jongdae’s, very shy now. Baekhyun squatted, offering his hand to Daeul with a smile. “Don’t be afraid, son.” Jongdae whispered. _Don’t be afraid to meet your father, son._

Daeul shook his hand then hid behind Jongdae, clinging to his leg. Baekhyun ruffled the kid’s hair instead and looked at his best friend, taking everything in.

“It’s been a while,” Baekhyun smiled. Jongdae wanted to punch him but he wanted to punch himself more.

“Yes. I see you did become a teacher like you wanted.” Jongdae looked at the preschool behind Baekhyun.

“Ah yes. It wasn’t as easy as we thought. What are you doing these days? Daeul said you were in a meeting. Did you continue music?” Baekhyun’s eyes sparkled. Jongdae’s dimmed.

“Ah no, marketing actually.” He pointed to his tie. “It pays the bills, Daeul’s tuition, all the toys, right?” Jongdae wiggled his brows to his son who just buried his face to Jongdae’s leg.

“I see, I see. I’m sorry about your mate. Daeul said he only has you. I bet he or she was wonderful.” Baekhyun touched Daeul’s cheek. Jongdae felt the little guy hug his leg tighter, getting irritated.

“Please don’t touch him.” It came out harsher than expected. Baekhyun stepped back, apologising. “Do you want to go out sometimes? Catch up and stuff? Wow, I’m so happy to see you again. Where have you been? Jongdae, I have so much to te--,”

“We’re going. Thank you for staying with him, Baekhyun.” The tone was too clipped.

Jongdae turned around quickly, Daeul in tow. Baekhyun was about to say something but he stopped himself. He just watched Jongdae put Daeul in the car seat, not sparing a glance at him. Baekhyun thought Jongdae’s mate’s passing must be tough for him to act like that. He didn’t mean to overstep anything but they’ve been friends for so long. He thought nothing would change much. Jongdae just showed him everything has.

Daeul looked so worried for his dad on the drive home. He didn’t respond as he usually did to Daeul’s stories. The child thought his dad was too tired so he kept quiet. Jongdae wiped his eyes with his sleeve. At the stoplight, Daeul unbuckled himself from the car seat and popped by Jongdae’s side. He wrapped his tiny arms around Jongdae, mumbling don’t cry. Daeul pouted, about to cry too because his lower lips trembled.

Jongdae let out a laugh when Daeul patted his head like he did when the child cried. He wiped his eyes and smiled to his son.

“Yes, I’m going to stop. Thank you, Daeulie.” Jongdae asked for a kiss on the cheek. “Go buckle in again. We might get pulled over.”

Daeul sat again, fumbling with the seatbelts. “I told you not to work too hard.” The kid mumbled sassily. Jongdae gave a hearty laugh. He was just scolded by his son. Daeul was definitely Jongdae’s son indeed.

When they got home, Jongdae washed up before dinner. Daeul looked at the shelf in the living room, suddenly curious about the contents. He pulled out a book and sat on the sofa with it. Jongdae came out in just his pyjama bottoms, shaking his wet hair with a towel. “What do you have there, kid?”

“Appa, it’s you and Uncle Kyungsoo and teacher?” Daeul held a photo of the three of them during high school graduation.

“Oh yes. I told you he was my friend from high school, right?” Daeul let out an adorable ‘ah’ and put the photo back in the book. Jongdae went to make dinner while Daeul retold his day since his dad’s feeling better. Jongdae answered like he usually did, asking Daeul to taste their dinner from time to time. That night, Daeul slept with Jongdae too. When they woke up, they went back to sleep again until it was noon. They took a photo together, sharing it to Jongdae’s parents. They planned on visiting them soon too.

* * *

In school, Baekhyun would run in to Daeul but the kid would run away. He thought the kid was just shy around him. The only instance he didn’t run away was when he was picked on. Kids from the other building got his animal biscuits and stepped on them. The dinosaur ones to be exact. Daeul cried for his dad which only made the older kids bully him. Baekhyun sighed and made his way to the kids.

“What’s going on here?” Baekhyun sounded like he was supposed to be a high school teacher, not one for preschool. Daeul ran to Baekhyun, hugging his leg immediately. “Did you just steal my student’s food? That isn’t tolerated in this school. I will report you to your adviser and your parents. Apologise.” And the kids did before running away. The stern teacher turned frantic as he looked at the situation around him.

Baekhyun sat Daeul down and wiped his tears with his own sleeve but the kid kept crying. Baekhyun picked up the broken crackers on the floor and placed them in a plastic bag. He offered the kid some juice, even toys, but Daeul still kept crying, calling for his dad. Baekhyun sighed and looked for the information tag on the kid’s bag.

He noticed that the number was different from what he had saved under Jongdae’s name. He dialled it, waiting for a pickup. Baekhyun hushed Daeul, wiping his tears. His heart ached for the kid for going through that. His expression made the teacher hug him tightly. Jongdae’s voice suddenly boomed to his ear.

“Ah, uh, it’s me.” Baekhyun lost all train of thought upon hearing him, releasing the child.

“Huh?” Right, Baekhyun was an unknown number.

“Baekhyun. Listen, you have to pick up Daeul now. He’s got in trouble with the kindergarteners. He’s been looking for you, Jongdae.”

“What? Hold on, I’m on my way.” Jongdae’s tone made Baekhyun feel something…weird. He heard rummaging and rushing on Jongdae’s end. Oh, he’s really coming.

“Do you want to talk to him?” Baekhyun whispered, eyes still on Daeul.

“Please. That would be helpful, Baekhyun. Thanks.”

Baekhyun watched Daeul calm and slowly smile. He didn’t hear what Jongdae said but seeing the kid smile was enough. Later on, Daeul passed the phone to Baekhyun with a shy thanks. He stayed with the child, treating him a juice pouch since his got punctured and stained his backpack.

Jongdae hit park immediately and ran out of the car. He jumped over the barrier, panicked about his son’s condition. He looked around the play area but no one was there. He heard singing at the side of the building; two voices. Jongdae walked towards it until Baekhyun’s shoes and Daeul’s swaying legs were in sight. They were singing together. Jongdae closed his eyes, trying to push his feelings aside. Baekhyun stopped singing when he saw Jongdae.

“Appa’s here, Daeul-ah.” Baekhyun pointed. Jongdae felt his chest twist. He’s be lying if he denied not imagining Baekhyun saying that in his apartment. Daeul jumped off the bench and ran to his dad. To Jongdae’s surprise, his son pulled him to the bench to sit.

“Appa, samchon daebak!” Daeul gave him a thumbs up.

“Since when was he your uncle, Daeul-ah? You can’t go around calling everyone uncle.” Jongdae’s brows shot up.

“Today. You’re my best friend after all.” Baekhyun smiled shyly. “Seonsaengim works too.” He shrugged.

“Daeul-ah, Baekhyunnie’s seonsaengnim in school, understood? You can call him samchon outside school.” Jongdae was disciplining his child. Baekhyun was in awe. He’s been referred to as Baekhyunnie too. Daeul nodded, leaning to his dad. They were about to go home when Baekhyun asked for a moment with Jongdae.

It had to happen sooner or later. Jongdae wasn’t being subtle about avoiding him anymore. They let Daeul play for a while but just within their sight. Baekhyun stayed silent while Jongdae’s heartbeat leapt wildly. _Did he know?_ As Jongdae worried, he felt Baekhyun rest his head on his shoulder. He was about to move away but the other had an arm on his lap.

“What are you doing?” Jongdae whispered, trying to move away.

“Tired,” Baekhyun sighed. “So many kids,”

Jongdae knew how that felt even if he only took care of one. He let Baekhyun rest for a bit while he checked his emails. He answered a few, apologised in the others. Whether his work was on the line or not, Jongdae always made sure Daeul came first.

“I wanted one, you know.” Baekhyun murmured. “I mean, I almost had one.” Jongdae stilled. Shit, this is it. Baekhyun would confront him that he figured out. “My mate was about to, but it wasn’t mine.” Oh my god. “Wait, she wasn’t really my mate if I never marked her, right? Anyway, I had to leave. I couldn’t raise that child knowing it wasn’t mine. You know how…aggressive I can be.”

“Alpha genes, yes.” Jongdae rolled his eyes. Baekhyun chuckled weakly with his eyes closed.

“Do you still think about it? What we did before?” Baekhyun spoke so softly. “Who am I kidding? You have a kid. You definitely moved on from that.”

Au contraire, Jongdae’s reminded every single day of his life of that moment since it happened. Every day he had to stare at the only thing that bound him to Baekhyun and loved it with all his heart because Baekhyun couldn’t. How insensitive of Baekhyun to say that? But, he didn’t know. Jongdae didn’t have a right to get mad because Baekhyun didn’t know. He didn’t want Baekhyun to know.

“Why are you bringing that up again? That was four years ago.” Jongdae chuckled, trying to hide his secret. Baekhyun shrugged.

“I just missed you after high school. You never hung out with us or called us, me specifically. I wondered if I did anything wrong to you. We were close since preschool, Jongdae. You just went cold after…that night, after we kissed at graduation. I thought we were,” Baekhyun was so in distraught about it. He ran his hands over his face.

“It was my fault, Baekhyun. I was dumped and you were there and…”

“Jongdae, we didn’t use protection that night. Many things could’ve gone wrong that night.” Baekhyun scoffed. Jongdae couldn’t believe it. His reaction was uncalled for.

“Either way I regret nothing.” Jongdae stood up and made his way to Daeul. Baekhyun followed, eyes boring the back of Jongdae’s head. Daeul obediently went with Jongdae.

“Huh, that’s weird.” Baekhyun turned around to his co-worker Chanyeol, who leaned on the brick wall near the bench. “I thought that kid was your nephew.”

“Nephew?” Baekhyun laughed. “It’s my best friend’s son.”

“Is it the same best friend you dream about?” Chanyeol teased.

“It’s not just him, you know. I feel like I’ve dreamt of that kid too. What made you think he’s my nephew?” Chanyeol pointed to Baekhyun’s brows and cheeks.

“Shame your best friend’s taken. I would’ve went for him.” Chanyeol shrugged.

“His mate’s gone, I think.” Baekhyun shrugged, going inside the building again.

“You sure? He’s got a strong scent on him, you know. Just no claim marks.”

“He’s a beta, Chanyeol. Let it go.” Baekhyun got his backpack.

“So what if he is? Whoever got him pregnant probably didn’t care about that either.” Chanyeol scoffed.

Baekhyun stopped walking. Jongdae was…pregnant? The look on Baekhyun’s face made Chanyeol feel the need to explain. “You didn’t notice the scar on his stomach when he picked up his son?” Chanyeol’s brow furrowed. Baekhyun tried to remember Jongdae from preschool to high school. He was positive he had no scar back then. Jongdae was spotless when they fucked.

“I have to go, Yeol.” Baekhyun pushed past him, running his hands in his hair.

* * *

Daeul held Kyungsoo’s hand on their way to school. It’s a Saturday but he’s required to go. It’s recognition day and parent play day. Jongdae had an emergency in the firm so he had Kyungsoo fill in until he caught up. Jongdae made sure Kyungsoo brought the camcorder to record Daeul’s moment onstage. Kyungsoo understood. It’s his first kid and he wanted all moments covered. He didn’t think Jongdae would be this kind of dad, maybe Baekhyun, but not Jongdae.

Baekhyun’s dressed in navy blue tailored pants and a cream sweater. Kyungsoo tapped his shoulder, startling the teacher. Daeul bowed to his teacher.

“What are you doing here?” Baekhyun held his chest to ease his heart.

“Jongdae had something up so I’m on uncle duties. Where do I take this dinosaur?” Kyungsoo pointed to Daeul, whose brows furrowed at his uncle’s teasing. Baekhyun ruffled his hair, ushering them to empty seats.

The program started smoothly. Baekhyun sat near the students, yawning from time to time and looking at Kyungsoo who held a camcorder. The beta smiled at him when the kids presented a dance. From his view, he could see Baekhyun’s expressions. He was so fond of them but his eyes were focused on one only; Daeul. He decided to make a plan.

Just when the students were lining up to receive their medals, Kyungsoo stood up and ran to Baekhyun.

“Hey, I’m sorry to do this but the hospital called.” Kyungsoo murmured. Baekhyun knew what was next. “Jongdae wanted Daeul’s moment recorded. Just press here and it does the trick.”

“Shit Soo, he’ll need a parent up there too you know!” Baekhyun panicked.

“What? I thought it was only just him.” Kyungsoo looked at the line forming at the side with parents standing up. “Please Baekhyun, my job’s on the line. Thanks, I owe you!” He kissed Baekhyun’s forehead and ran. Baekhyun was left stunned with a camcorder and the responsibility to go with Daeul onstage.

“Baekhyun, where’s Daeul’s dad? He’s the only one without a parent. He kept asking for Uncle Soo.” Chanyeol whispered behind him. Baekhyun stared at the camcorder for so long, the roll call began. He had to do something. The kid already voiced out how upset he got when other kids had two parents while he had one. Now he had none.

He stood up quickly, instructing Chanyeol with a camcorder, and ran to the other side of the room to stand in as Daeul’s parent. _When he is Daeul’s parent._ The kid blinked at him.

“Sorry Daeul-ah, Uncle Soo had to take care of something.” Baekhyun fixed his shirt and hair.

“Camcorder?” Daeul worried. He really wanted to let his dad see him go up.

“Uh Chanyeol seonsaengnim,” Baekhyun chuckled. Daeul faced forward, holding Baekhyun’s hand.

The vice-principal was stunned to see Baekhyun with Daeul. Everyone knew they were close but not to the point of standing in as his parent. Daeul bowed, thanking the school head. The vice-principal shook Baekhyun’s hand, pulling him to talk.

“Where’s his dad?” She asked.

“Something came up. His uncle came with him but he’s a nurse and well,” Baekhyun explained quickly.

“Is Daeul alright?” She worried.

“He seemed to understand. His dad might make it for the play date.” Baekhyun filled. They were ushered to stand on the side until their line was complete.

Baekhyun went down first, lifting Daeul to jump off the stairs. He let the kid sit beside him for the rest of the program. Chanyeol passed him the camcorder, congratulating Daeul for his Rank 2 medal. The kid was looking at his medal happily. Baekhyun checked the video, complimenting Chanyeol for focusing only on Daeul. Only Baekhyun’s legs were seen the whole time. Daeul leaned on Baekhyun, very bored with the remainder of the event.

When it was time for snacks, Daeul sat with the teachers. Baekhyun and Chanyeol pretended to be his parents for the meantime. The kid didn’t mind as long as he wasn’t alone. He even joked with Chanyeol. Baekhyun was so happy every time he was Daeul. The other teachers noticed it too. In the teacher’s room, they would always tell him how Daeul was good for him since the sham with his ex-girlfriend. Baekhyun acknowledged it. He always wanted a kid in his life, so spending time with his best friend’s son eased the longing somehow.

Play date segment came and Daeul didn’t feel like he was lacking. Baekhyun always tended to him, playing with anything he wanted. They interacted with his classmates and even played by themselves. Baekhyun was teaching Daeul some hand games, joking about eating his stomach and feet, and just making the kid happy in general. Daeul looked around the room, squealing when he saw his dad. Baekhyun looked up, relieved and grateful Jongdae made it somehow.

Jongdae picked up his son, apologising again for being late. Daeul pointed to Baekhyun happily. He then pouted and nodded. Jongdae whispered him something and let the kid go. Daeul ran back to Baekhyun and hugged his legs. Baekhyun looked down at the kid’s smile.

“Thank you, seonsaengnim. I love you.” Daeul gushed. Baekhyun felt his ears hot.

“He can be clingy if he wants,” Jongdae smiled, finally in front of his best friend.

“Just like his dad,” Baekhyun teased. “I’m glad you still caught up.”

“He seemed safe here even with Kyungsoo bailing. Knowing you’re here makes me calm Daeul’s in good hands.” Jongdae pocketed his hands. Baekhyun nodded, thankful for his best friend not changing his views towards him.

Baekhyun handed him Daeul’s silver medal. Jongdae was shocked. His baby Daeul’s 2nd place! Jongdae picked him up, throwing him in the air. Daeul’s giggles made Baekhyun’s chest pound. Jongdae spun him around until Daeul whined to be put down. He always knew how to annoy his son. Jongdae promised to buy him whatever he wanted after the play date. Daeul shook his head.

“I want to buy seonsaengnim a gift, Appa.” the kid whispered to him. Jongdae looked at Baekhyun briefly and nodded. He did promise to buy whatever Daeul wanted.

The play date continued. Daeul was having fun with his classmates so Jongdae took a seat on the bench to catch his breath. Baekhyun flopped down later on with a water bottle. Jongdae took it gratefully and drank from it. Baekhyun leaned on him, panting heavily. He’s been some kids’ horse ride for 20 minutes. Jongdae pressed the same water bottle on Baekhyun’s lips, letting him drink.

“Kids are intense. I think my spine broke.” Baekhyun groaned, holding his back. Jongdae nodded, knowing what he meant.

“I’m amazed you keep up with everyone. Daeul’s pretty hard to deal with sometimes.” Jongdae admitted.

“He’s a good kid, Jongdae. You raised him well from what I see, even without a mate.” Baekhyun complimented. Jongdae scoffed.

“Guess Daeul’s still gossiping about that, huh? Can’t say I blame him for it.”

“His smile’s really something, though. It just lights up the room.” Baekhyun noticed.

“Just like yours?” Jongdae smirked. He immediately wiped it off, hoping Baekhyun wouldn’t notice.

“No, definitely not like mine. His is brighter for sure.” Baekhyun modestly said.

A loud cry made the both of them stand up. Daeul fell down. Jongdae ran to pick him up, brushing his shorts clean. He sat the kid on his knee, checking where it hurts. Baekhyun stood frozen with his heart dropping. Chanyeol whistled, moving closer to Baekhyun.

“I know that look, Baek. Are you sure you want to go there again?” Chanyeol whispered.

Baekhyun swallowed hard, letting his words sink in his head. He’s been hurt a lot by different people but Jongdae left the most damage. Chanyeol saw the development of how he got back on his feet and dated again. That also led to a letdown. If he put his foot in the water again and fell in love, could he take it or be drowned again? Baekhyun wasn’t sure if his decisions were always the best ones but his gut pulled him to this one. The signs blinked around him, the person’s there in front of him, but his heart’s still in repair. It has been for so long. When will it end? When will he feel whole again?

* * *

Jongdae opened the front door with a frown on his face. Daeul was behind him, sporting the same expression. Kyungsoo smiled. “I brought dessert!”

The Kim duo looked at each other, assessing the peace offering. Jongdae shrugged. Daeul turned his head with an eye roll. The two men chuckled at him. _So Baekhyun._

They put Daeul in the living room with all the desserts and his favourite cartoons while they tucked themselves in the balcony with beer. Kyungsoo apologised for leaving Daeul unexpectedly during the recognition and play date day.

“You had to leave him with Baekhyun. You’re really trying to do everything, huh?” Jongdae sighed.

“You won’t move. I know you’ve heard Daeul complain about other kids having two parents many times. Why can’t you just tell him, the both of them?” Kyungsoo’s tone was calm, like he’s so tired of this. He looked at Daeul laughing by himself inside.

“You think I still don’t want to? When I see them together, I regret keeping him for so long. I see how they make each other so happy, Soo. Honestly, I miss having Baekhyun around too.” Jongdae smiled to the horizon.

“That didn’t stop you from spending dismissals with him, holding hands again, head kisses.” Kyungsoo smirked. Jongdae choked on his drink. “Baekhyun tells me everything now, Jongdae. I’m the best friend now.” He teased. “Joking aside, he’s so happy to see you again, even with Daeul. He’s getting a soft spot for the kid. Isn’t that a clue to start moving?”

“What should I do, Soo? He’s too young to understand what I did.” Jongdae shook his head.

“Tell Baekhyun first. He’ll think of a way to break it to Daeul gently. He’s the child expert after all.” Kyungsoo finished his drink. “You’re getting sloppy, Jongdae. It won’t be soon before he finds out from someone else.” Jongdae took that as a threat, a challenge. He looked at Daeul then closed his eyes. He has to start sooner if Daeul’s that fond of Baekhyun and vice versa.

* * *

Baekhyun’s getting more teasing about Daeul in school. the kid looked for him even outside the teacher’s room. They started to label the kid as Baekhyun’s temporary son. He was picking up most of Baekhyun’s words and actions. Chanyeol sometimes thought Daeul was a mini Baekhyun in class. The teacher always explained he was his best friend’s son so the closeness couldn’t be helped.

At the playdate, most teachers gossiped when Daeul’s dad came. The vice-principal gasped seeing Jongdae smile at Baekhyun. “That must be his best friend,”

“Yes. He looks a lot like Daeul.” Another teacher with a bob mumbled.

“Why is Baekhyun’s ear pink? Oh my god!” Another teacher with a fringe squealed. Chanyeol looked at the three women gushing while he sipped from a juice pouch.

“Oh, Daddy Kim’s down.” The bobbed teacher noticed.

“Here comes Baekhyun,” The vice-principal pointed. When Baekhyun leaned on Jongdae, the three of them gave each other high-fives.

“Oh! They shared the same bottle!” Fringed teacher squealed.

“They’re best friends since preschool, what do you expect?” Chanyeol piped.

“Nothing, Park. They’re just so cute together. No one can deny there’s something between them. Look at how they hold hands.” Bobbed teacher pointed out.

“I heard some parents said they were cute together too. Shame Mr. Kim’s mated.” Fringed teacher pouted.

“Really? I heard the mate’s gone.” The vice-principal added. Chanyeol groaned. Why were his co-teachers full of gossip?

Chanyeol informed Baekhyun about the gossips but he just laughed it off. The tall teacher wondered what the deal was because it was really convincing. Baekhyun confessed that he liked Jongdae since middle school but was confused about the other’s feelings. They shared some kisses and even Baekhyun’s first time. Their relationship was that deep so their closeness was understandable. What Chanyeol didn’t ask was the pain that flashed in his friend’s eyes.

* * *

Daeul was picked up by Jongdae at the right time the other day. He refused to leave yet. Jongdae thought the child wanted to play more so he just waited. Baekhyun and Chanyeol came out, ready to go home too. Daeul ran to Baekhyun, hugging his legs. Jongdae watched them. Chanyeol smiled at the kid, who was smiling brightly to Baekhyun. The smaller teacher met his eyes and lent his ear for the kid to whisper to. He looked at Jongdae, smile fading. Daeul frowned, looking at his dad too. Baekhyun urged him to go to Jongdae.

“Appa, can seonsaengnim come over to play tomorrow?” Daeul pouted once he was in front of his dad.

“What?” Jongdae almost dropped his phone. Baekhyun shrugged from afar. “Don’t you play enough here?”

“Appa!” Daeul whined loudly, bordering a tantrum. Jongdae pinched his nose bridge and nodded. He really couldn’t deny his son of anything anymore. Daeul hugged Jongdae’s legs then pulled him to Baekhyun and Chanyeol. “Seonsaengnim! You can come over! Appa,” Daeul wiggled his brows up and down. Jongdae didn’t know what he meant. Baekhyun was concealing his laugh.

“I’ll text your dad for your address, Daeulie. Stop torturing him.” Baekhyun chuckled. Jongdae was amazed he understood the child’s actions. “Go with Chanyeol seonsaengnim for a bit. We’ll just talk, okay?” Daeul obliged, leaving the two.

“You don’t have to, Jongdae. I’ll just tell him an excuse like,”

“Just come over. He’ll never let us hear the end of it if we deny him of fun.” Jongdae got his phone and typed the address. “I swear, he’s just like you sometimes.”

Jongdae stopped typing, shocked that slipped from his mouth. Baekhyun whispered an apology. He didn’t have to. Jongdae met his eyes. “Uh, just, yeah, tell the doorman you came for Daeul.”

“Can’t I say I came for you too?” Baekhyun smiled shyly, rubbing his nape. Jongdae felt his ears heating. He continued typing to avoid anything stupid. “I really want us to hang out again, Dae.”

The beta tried to keep his ground. The alpha swallowed thickly. Jongdae wanted to pull him by his coat and kiss him senseless but he’s Kim Jongdae, a man of restraint. Baekhyun got his phone out of Jongdae’s hands, skin touching his lightly. It felt electric. Baekhyun withdrew his hand quickly, rubbing his fingertips. Jongdae rubbed the back of his hand.

“Static,” Jongdae mumbled.

“Let’s get out of here. It’s too cold.” Baekhyun reasoned. Jongdae agreed, rushing to Daeul. The teachers watched the two leave. Once the car was out of sight, Baekhyun slumped to the floor. Chanyeol looked around, frantic his best friend might have died.

“Chanyeol-ah,” Baekhyun looked up to him. “We still feel the same.”

“What?” The tall one knelt in front of him.

“I wanted to kiss him, but his son’s watching. He might find it weird.” Baekhyun smiled to the floor. “Daeul called me appa.”

“What?” The octave raised, breaking Chanyeol’s voice slightly.

_“Seonsaengim, come closer!” Daeul tugged Baekhyun’s pants. The teacher knelt and lent his ear. “Can you come over tomorrow? I think appa’s lonely so we don’t play. Please come over and be my other appa.”_

_Baekhyun’s heart dropped. The kid saw him as his dad. That’s why he looked at Jongdae in shock. “Uh, that’s too much to say, Daeul-ah. Your appa might be in a relationship with someone else. We’re not, he’s not, I’m--have you asked your appa?” How could Baekhyun find the right words to say? Daeul wanted him with his dad._

_“You make appa happy, samchon. He smiles for hours when he sees you. You smile too when we talk about him. That’s love, right samchon?” Daeul pouted._

_“Daeul-ah, love can mean many things to different people. It’s not, we’re not,” Baekhyun was running out of words._

_“But you love appa, right? You love me, right?” Daeul was close to tears._

_“Of course, Daeul. I love you both. What you’re asking is...different. But we can play together. Can you ask permission from appa first? It’s not right to invite people without letting him know.” Baekhyun smiled kindly. Daeul nodded, shoulders slumped as he made his way to Jongdae to ask if Baekhyun could come over._

Chanyeol died from laughter on the floor. His best friend must’ve saved a royal in his past life to have everything come around full circle. The kid wanted him to date his dad. That was easier than he thought. Chanyeol wanted to help but he’s too invested in laughing to say anything. Baekhyun frowned and stood up, kicking the other before leaving. Chanyeol ran after him, arm over his shoulder. “So what are you bringing over to your crush and your stepson?” Baekhyun groaned, hitting him with his backpack.

* * *

 

“Hello?” Daeul answered the intercom.

“Daeulie, it’s the front desk. Baekhyun is here to see you.” The lady said cheerily.

“He’s here for appa too. Please tell him to come up.” Daeul copied the lady’s tone. He hung up and ran around to clean up a bit, even if the place was spotless. He got his toys from his room and threw them to the living room.

Jongdae came out from the shower in just his jeans, button undone too. He shook his hair with the towel, looking for Daeul in the apartment. He saw the toys in the living toom but the kid was nowhere in sight. The doorbell rang. He answered it without checking the peephole because he was curious about Daeul’s whereabouts. Jongdae turned his attention to the person at the door, flinching when he realised it was Baekhyun.

The teacher was dressed in an oversized white shirt, washed denim, and white sneakers. His hair was silvery blonde now. His beady eyes were framed with gold-rimmed lenses, pink lips parted. Jongdae swallowed thickly, seeing how cute his best friend looked. He realised he was quite underdressed so he chuckled shyly.

“Uh, I brought beef and some cake. Thought we’d, uh, have lunch and uh, cook together instead of going out.” Baekhyun’s breath was betraying him. His crush’s half-nakedly looking like a meal in front of him. Jongdae stepped aside, discreetly hiding his body behind the door while Baekhyun entered. The two seemed to sweat to themselves.

Jongdae went in first since Baekhyun was still taking his shoes off. He told Daeul Baekhyun was here so the kid ran out while Jongdae got a shirt. The kid jumped in Baekhyun’s arms, making him lose his balance and stumble back.

“What are we playing first?” Baekhyun smiled. Daeul pulled him to his Lego set and tried to keep up. Jongdae emerged from the rooms in a muscle shirt. Baekhyun tuned out Daeul for a moment to stare. Jongdae acknowledged him through his brows. Baekhyun smiled a bit, turning his attention to Daeul.

Jongdae began cooking lunch. Daeul tackled Baekhyun, squealing happily at the teacher’s groaning. He called a timeout to catch his breath. Jongdae looked at them, smiling stupidly on the floor. “Daeul-ah, get him some water. We’re not sure if he’s insured.” He quipped. Daeul ran to get him water. Baekhyun mouthed his thanks to Jongdae. The kid wasn’t exactly thin. Baekhyun crawled to the sofa and laid there. Daeul handed him the water and watched him drink it. Jongdae dipped his finger in the sauce, tasting it quickly.

“You still do that?” Baekhyun noticed. Jongdae’s caught. He looked at him with his finger still in his mouth. The blond giggled through his lip bite and eye smile. Daeul cleaned his toys without being told. Baekhyun went to the kitchen, hovering behind Jongdae while he grilled the meat. “Taste this,” Jongdae offered the wooden spoon over his shoulder. Baekhyun did as told, placing his hands on Jongdae’s waist to balance himself.

“Oh, you’ve definitely improved from ramen.” Baekhyun teased. Jongdae elbowed him. “I’ll set the table.”

Daeul helped Baekhyun prepared some drinks while Jongdae placed the food on the table. They sat together, thanking each other for the meal. Jongdae couldn’t help but think how comfortable this felt. The apartment felt brighter and calmer, all thanks to Baekhyun. Daeul’s smiling a lot, Baekhyun’s being himself, but Jongdae, still pained for the man in front of him.

Baekhyun did the dishes while Jongdae put Daeul in nap mode. Once the single father came out, Baekhyun was picking up his things to leave.

“Where are you going?” Jongdae asked with a smile.

“I--Daeul’s asleep, right? It’s best to leave while he’s still asleep.” Baekhyun smiled shyly.

“But you wanted to hang out, remember? Let’s go?” Jongdae got a coat from the cabinet near the door. Baekhyun’s stunned. He took his offer.

The two went out for ice cream just near Jongdae’s place. They walked silently, unsure of what to say to each other. When they got to the ice cream store, Baekhyun narrowed his eyes to read. Jongdae walked to the counter with no qualms, asking for two Rainbow Madness with extra strawberries. To be placed in one bowl. Baekhyun was about to slide his card but Jongdae hugged him from behind so his arms wouldn’t move. He whispered for him to get a table already. Baekhyun did as told but shoved Jongdae playfully before leaving.

They shared ice cream, talking about college and in between. Baekhyun talked about Chanyeol while Jongdae talked about Daeul. Jongdae let Baekhyun eat all the strawberry bits. He knew how much the other loved them. Baekhyun’s cheek was stained with syrup. Jongdae wiped it off with his thumb and ate it. Baekhyun mumbled his thanks and kept talking. Jongdae’s attention never diverted away from him. All he could do was feel grateful that he was looking at the eyes of the one he loved the most.

Baekhyun insisted of walking Jongdae home because they were still joking around about Kyungsoo’s quips about Jongdae’s fatherhood. When they reached the door, Baekhyun didn’t go in. Jongdae sighed and grabbed him by the shirt to enter again.

The two were cooking dinner, Baekhyun in charge of the pan this time. Jongdae leaned on the counter, watching his best friend cook. Baekhyun hummed a nursery rhyme while checking the rice. Jongdae couldn’t stop himself. He sauntered over, arms sliding around Baekhyun’s waist, resting his chin on the elder’s shoulder. He breathed in deeply, letting the strawberry scented skin flood his system, letting himself fall in love again. Baekhyun froze, looking at the arms around him. Jongdae kissed his nape softly, murmuring a soft apology to his skin.

“Will you ever forgive me for running away, Baek?” Jongdae whispered. Baekhyun nodded.

“I have, a long time ago. I’m just happy you’re okay, Dae. I thought we’d meet at one of our funerals, to be honest.” He squeezed the beta’s hand. Jongdae closed his eyes, forehead pressed to Baekhyun’s back. He really wasn’t okay. His tongue seemed caught again. Baekhyun felt the guilt from him, but why?

He turned around to hug Jongdae, cradling his head to his shoulder. Jongdae took a deep breath, Baekhyun’s smell enveloping him. It’s the comfort he longed for. If only he said something sooner, it wouldn’t be so hard.

They were face to face, just a few inches away from each other. Baekhyun searched for his eyes, some kind of confirmation Jongdae’s feeling the same. The beta wouldn’t let him see that. He preferred letting the other feel it. Jongdae’s hands cupped Baekhyun’s face, slowly trailing them down his neck, stopping to his chest. His heart beat so fast, it matched Jongdae’s. One heart pulsed as they stood frozen. After almost five years, they were in the same position where things changed for them. Baekhyun’s feelings, however, stayed the same.

Jongdae leaned in, Baekhyun getting the message. They seemed hesitant, like their restaints got extra rusty for them to move. At the same time, the string that bound them together only kept getting tighter. Their lips were too close, barely touching, breaths dancing against each other. Just one more and it’ll be how things were supposed to be. One more and their aching hearts would be mended.

A crash down the hall startled Jongdae. Baekhyun finally closed his eyes...in frustration. It’s etched all over his face. He slowly let go of Jongdae but the other only held on. The beta made him look at him. A feather-like kiss touched his lips.

Baekhyun was left in the kitchen, trying to process if he just felt that. Jongdae went to Daeul’s room to check what happened. The alpha slowly dropped to the floor, covering his mouth. It was damp. It was real. Jongdae still loved him after all these years. Daeul found him on the floor, odd look on his face. The kid ignored him. Maybe he could be Daeul’s stepdad. The thought crossed in his mind. If Jongdae still loved him, it could happen, right?

The playdates became more often. Jongdae was getting used to Baekhyun coming over often but none talked about what happened. They remained civil, because that’s all Jongdae could do. He kissed Baekhyun and has been regretting it ever since. The weight of this secret slowly crumbled him. Every time Baekhyun spared him a glance or Daeul hugged Baekhyun, his chest only hollowed deeper. How cruel was he to deprive the two boys he loved of their own happiness? How selfish of him to think that way too. Daeul’s smile was close to Baekhyun’s. They mirrored the thing that made Jongdae’s heart swell. Fate must be mocking him for bringing the two people he wanted apart together. _Daeul-ah, please love your appa more than you loved me. He’s been waiting for you, my love._

* * *

“Thanks for dropping me off.” Baekhyun said to Chanyeol as he got out of the car.

“No problem. See you Monday!” Chanyeol waved and drove off. Baekhyun went inside the hospital, greeting the guards and some patients. He looked for his friend’s hospital room and went there immediately. He wondered if Kyungsoo would be around the hospital. They could have dinner together if he was. He made a mental note to message him after visiting his friend.

“Aigoo, that cute kid’s back!” A female nurse gushed when Baekhyun went out of his friend’s room.

“He’s with his dad again. They’re so nice to volunteer and bring toys for the kids.” The male nurse nodded.

“His dad’s pretty good-looking too, you know. How can a beta look like that?” She whined.

Baekhyun made his way to the elevators when he heard a familiar laugh.

“Daeul-ah, will you have your checkup today?” The nurse asked.

“Yes!” Daeul said happily.

“You’re very smart bringing Daeul here regularly. He’s a rare case, a special pup indeed. Your pregnancy was a big talk around here because of that. Kyungsoo always scolded us when we talked about it.” the nurse sighed. So Jongdae was the one that got pregnant. Baekhyun tried to move closer, careful he wouldn’t be seen. “Whoever that alpha was, he must be special.”

“He’s the most special, yes.” Jongdae nodded. Baekhyun could see Jongdae’s face but Daeul was too small to reach the counter so he sat on the chairs.

“Has he met him?” the nurse whispered. Jongdae shook his head.

“It’s been tough. Daeul wouldn’t understand now, but we see his dad from time to time.”

“I thought the alpha doesn’t know. Oh my, that must be hard for you.” the nurse gasped. Jongdae nodded, his smile fading slightly.

Daeul jumped off the seat and held Jongdae’s hand as they made their way to the doctor’s office. Baekhyun hit head on the wall, trying to remember how old they were four years ago. He tried to recall everything since then, confused how Jongdae got pregnant. He only knew one person that kept in contact with Jongdae all this time. He sent him a text, asking where he was. Baekhyun ran his hands his hair, getting nervous.

 _I’m at home._ Baekhyun pocketed his phone and ducked his head just in case Jongdae and Daeul met his way.

* * *

Kyungsoo sighed at the banging on his door. As he got closer, he recognised the smell. He opened the door while he rubbed his eye under his glasses. His shirt was suddenly grabbed by Baekhyun, choking him to the wall.

“You. Talk. Was Jongdae pregnant in high school?” Baekhyun was pissed. Beyond pissed. Kyungsoo told him to calm down.

“I don’t know. Will you calm down?” Kyungsoo pushed him back but Baekhyun didn’t budge. He thought the elder was drunk but there was no scent of alcohol on him. Shit, this anger was real.

“Daeul. He’s four years old. Subtract that to our age. It’s the age when we were seniors in high school, when we graduated high school. Jongdae just broke up with Minseok around that time and it’s impossible for omegas to impregnate betas.”

“Male betas and male alphas can’t get pregnant too.” Kyungsoo rolled his eyes. Baekhyun let him go, stunned. His thoughts were getting confirmed slowly.

“H-How would you think of that pairing specifically?” Baekhyun whispered in shock. Kyungsoo replayed what he said of his head then hit his head hard as he coughed. “He told you. Jongdae told you what happened with us. Why? Did something happen after that?” Kyungsoo still coughed.

“He—he didn’t want to ruin your future.” Kyungsoo gasped for air. “Sorry, Baekhyun.” The alpha shook his head, stepping back from Kyungsoo.

“He’s mine. I got Jongdae pregnant that night. Daeul’s my son.” Baekhyun whispered, his brain cells working on overdrive. Kyungsoo watched him lose his footing, falling to the floor. Baekhyun repeated his words, sobbing to his hands. Kyungsoo rubbed his shoulders, hushing him as reality became clear. It’s all he could do. He’s even surprised how the eldest reacted to it. He’s not...mad.

All his feelings since he met Daeul, spending time with the kid, his heart racing when he saw Jongdae; it all made sense. “Kyungsoo, I missed four years of his life, their lives. How could that be? How could I not see it? Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Baekhyun, it’s not your fault. Jongdae didn’t want you to know. He thought you’d leave him once you found out and find someone else. He was trying to save you from this struggle.” Kyungsoo tried to make him feel better, tried to justify Jongdae’s actions.

“For the last fucking time, I’m not Minseok!” Baekhyun growled. “Didn’t he get the message when we kissed at graduation?” Kyungsoo looked curious. Baekhyun felt the need to explain. “We made out after you left.” Kyungsoo gagged, tasting something sour in his mouth. He really couldn’t get used to his best friends pouncing on each other.

“Why couldn’t he see I’ve been in love with him for so long? Fuck Soo, I gave him my first. Wasn’t that love enough?” Baekhyun scoffed, anger surfacing slowly.

“That’s what I told him!” Kyungsoo wanted to pull his hair out.

“How could be deprive me of my own son, our son? I missed his birth, his first steps, his first words. I missed four years of his life, Kyungsoo. Do you know how painful that is?” Baekhyun squeaked a sob again. It started to look crazy.

“You’ll be with him for the rest of his life, Baek. You don’t know how long I wanted to tell you, for Daeul to stop asking me why he only had one dad.”

Baekhyun cried and cried, feeling so sorry for not being there for his son. In truth, he wasn’t mad at Jongdae for doing what he did. He wasn’t mad at Kyungsoo for keeping it. He was mad at himself for not seeing it sooner, for not finding Jongdae harder, for not telling him his feelings earlier. Because maybe, just maybe, they both would’ve saved each other from so much heartache. Daeul could’ve grown up without these questions and lived happily.

If one secret was kept, Kyungsoo could keep another. Baekhyun made him promise to not tell Jongdae that he knew. He didn’t want this to affect Daeul’s growth, not until Jongdae’s ready. He had to find another way to get to Jongdae and Daeul. Baekhyun was determined to never miss another birthday, another first, another moment with his son and true mate.

* * *

Baekhyun was always present during dismissal time. He would seek out Daeul, check on him when he played, just until Jongdae arrived. It always put a smile on his face when Daeul ran to Jongdae’s arms. Baekhyun was sure Jongdae raised their son well. At least that came out well.

Another positive was Daeul’s interaction towards him. The kid warmed up, waving at him when they passed by, hugging him when he was happy. Since Daeul wasn’t Baekhyun’s student but Chanyeol’s, he would excuse Daeul from Chanyeol’s class just to eat at the cafeteria. He learned how bright his son was. He was so creative and imaginative, Baekhyun always added to his thoughts. It gave more hope to the child to think freely.

One time he pulled Daeul out to eat ramyun in the faculty cafeteria. It was against the rules to bring students in but Baekhyun had a loophole. Daeul was his son, not just his student. They ate in silence. Daeul was contented with his serving, smiling at Baekhyun from time to time. He looked so much like Jongdae when he smiled with his mouth full. He wiped Daeul’s chin and ate the excess.

“Oh, appa does that too.” Daeul noticed, mumbling to himself. Baekhyun knew that. He learned it from him. The same parenting could help Daeul adjust or recognise a father figure in him, Baekhyun thought.

“Daeul-ah, can I ask you something? Just…don’t tell your dad, okay?” Baekhyun gauged the child. Daeul put a whole Gimbap in his mouth while he held his pinky out. Baekhyun looked at it then wrapped his pinky as promise.

“I don’t mean to invade your privacy but…where’s your other dad or mom?” Baekhyun tried to speak slowly. Daeul shrugged, sipping his ramyun without looking at the elder. “Your dad never told you about him?” He shook his head sadly.

“Baekhyun seonsaengnim, I feel sad.” The kid began opening up. “My classmates have two parents but I only have one. Uncle Kyungsoo said he can’t be my dad. It makes me sad.” Daeul pouted. His cheeks drooped further when he did that. Baekhyun’s heart hurt for him.

Baekhyun ruffled his hair, smiling sadly, sympathising for the kid’s longing. They’ve felt the same, both made fools by Jongdae, but both didn’t blame him. It’s slightly easier for Baekhyun now because he knew Daeul’s his son but for the kid, he’s been waiting. He’s too young to notice that his real father’s in front of him, always guiding him for some time now

And it’s not the first time Daeul expressed this. It’s unfortunate for Daeul to be feeling like that at a young age. All he wanted was both of his parents with him. He didn’t care where he was growing up. He just wanted to know him, at least a name.

“Seonsaengnim, I have a question.” Daeul raised his hand like he was in class. Baekhyun smiled.

“What is it?” He tilted his head, expression softening.

“Can you come to Appa’s birthday party on Saturday?” Daeul raised the bowl, drinking from it. Baekhyun assisted him so the bowl won’t go over his face.

“Ah, I don’t think I can, Daeul-ah. Your dad didn’t invite me.” Baekhyun declined kindly.

“Why not? You’re friends! I will tell appa to invite you. You’re my guest.” Daeul seemed determined. Baekhyun wanted to hug his son. He’s seeing himself little by little in him already.

Dismissal came. Jongdae stood by the entrance, waiting for Daeul. He wore casual clothes that day. No linen shirt, slacks and necktie. Baekhyun held Daeul’s hand while they walked to the entrance. It’s how father and son were supposed to be anyway.

“Oh, hi,” Jongdae was civil with Baekhyun but the smile seemed too wide.

“Appa, I invited seonsaengnim to your party on Saturday.” Daeul announced. The smile faded.

“I told him I wouldn’t go because it’s rude to invite others to someone else’s party.” Baekhyun smiled, showing it was okay.

“Oh, you can come,” Jongdae blinked. Baekhyun blushed. “To my party, I mean. Daeul will get mad at me if I uninvited his guests.”

“Please come seonsaengniiiim!” Daeul tugged his hand.

“I will try, okay?” Baekhyun didn’t want to promise anything, especially with Jongdae watching.

Baekhyun let Daeul go but the other held on. Jongdae’s brows shot up. Daeul didn’t do that people he wasn’t close with. It was only for him, his parents, and Kyungsoo.

“Daeul-ah, you have to go home.” Baekhyun laughed nervously.

“No!” Daeul screamed, throwing a fit.

“It’s okay. I guess he still wants to play, right?” Jongdae smiled to his son. Nothing really stopped Daeul until he got what he wanted. That’s very Baekhyun of him honestly. When the permission was given, Daeul ran to the playground, leaving Baekhyun and Jongdae together.

The two stood awkwardly. Baekhyun rubbed his nape while Jongdae fumbled with his phone. “Jongdae, uh, do you want to get something to eat first? The cafeteria’s still open.” Baekhyun offered. It wasn’t a date, he thought. It really wasn’t a date.

“Hmm? Ah, sure. Will Daeul be okay there?” Jongdae pointed to the group of kids. Baekhyun nodded.

The two sat across each other, sharing a plate of Gimbap. Jongdae ate heartily. He must be really hungry then.

“No work?” Baekhyun pointed his chopsticks to Jongdae’s shirt and button-down.

“No. I called in sick. It’s getting really stuffy in corporate.” Jongdae talked with his mouth full. Just like Daeul. Baekhyun chuckled.

“You were never fit for corporate, Jongdae.” Baekhyun mumbled shyly, tapping each roll before getting what he would eat. Jongdae agreed, getting Baekhyun’s chosen piece first. “Ya!” Jongdae laughed.

They continued to play until there was one roll left. Baekhyun anticipated Jongdae’s move, getting the whole plate and running away.

“Ah! Baekhyun-ah! Play fair!” Jongdae’s whine echoed the empty cafeteria. Baekhyun stuck his tongue out. Jongdae ran after him. Baekhyun bumped his hip, pushing Jongdae back. Jongdae’s arms were trying to get in but Baekhyun still held the plate. He put it down quick and held the Gimbap. Jongdae got the hand that held the food and forced it to put it in his mouth. Baekhyun gave in slightly, Jongdae biting his fingers accidentally.

“No wonder Daeul eats like no tomorrow.” Baekhyun held his bitten hand while Jongdae happy danced for getting the last Gimbap.

“He eats like an alpha, right? I hope he would be one. It would be easier for him.” Jongdae nodded with a smile. Baekhyun nodded in understanding. Because a beta had to raise a pup by himself. A beta wasn’t openly accepted in society. A beta had to give up his dreams for another. A beta ran away to save another’s future. A beta, the one Baekhyun loved all his life, the father of his son.

“Jongdae, please tell Daeul-ah I can’t make it to your party.” Baekhyun lowered his head, changing the direction of their conversation.

“Just go with Kyungsoo. Daeul would be happy if you two would be there. No one’s really invited except Kyungsoo.” Jongdae smiled but it held so much meaning.

“D-Do you want me to be there?” It took the beta by surprise. He’s not much of a liar so he nodded. Baekhyun nodded back, happiness swelling in his chest, no longer having the strength to decline. How could he refuse the love of his life?

It was Jongdae’s birthday. Daeul got up first and jumped on his dad’s bed to greet him. Jongdae groaned, letting his son do whatever he wanted. Daeul giggled and kissed his Dad, singing happy birthday to him. Jongdae gave up and woke up, singing with him. Daeul ran and left him to gather his wits. When he came out, Daeul had a drawing of a cake and a message underneath.

_Appa, happy birthday! Happy birthday, appa! Thank you! I love you! Love, Daeulie_

Jongdae beamed, scooping his son up for a big hug. He showered him with kisses, thanking him for a wonderful present. They went out for breakfast then took pictures while they ate. Daeul was really happy today, happier than the birthday boy himself.

When the time for the party came, Daeul pulled his special chair to the door and waited. Jongdae asked him to help set up the table but he kept looking at the door. After they finished fixing everything, knocks on the door made Daeul squeal and run.

“Hey! There’s the wonder boy!” Kyungsoo knelt on the floor, hugging the kid. Baekhyun smiled at the kid, ruffling his hair. “Where’s Jongdae?” Kyungsoo got up, making his way to the kitchen.

“Seonsaengnim!” Daeul hugged Baekhyun’s legs. Baekhyun smiled, closing the door behind him. His eyes met Jongdae’s briefly. They smiled at Daeul’s happiness. Kyungsoo felt like it was going to be a long night having the two in the same room again.

They ate like old times, except Daeul interrupting everyone to ask a question. Jongdae sat next to Daeul, Baekhyun across him. It was pretty awkward. Kyungsoo felt suffocated too. Jongdae asked for dessert but Kyungsoo said he didn’t bring any.

“Ah why?” Daeul and Jongdae whined together loudly. Kyungsoo put his fork down and rubbed his temples.

“How can there be two of you already?” Kyungsoo said exasperated. Baekhyun laughed at his side, finding it adorable. The father and son duo fist bumped.

“Of all the things you can teach him, you had to start with no-no and ah why? Was his pouting not cute enough?” Kyungsoo hit Jongdae’s arm. The birthday boy tried to look innocent with a shrug. Baekhyun chuckled while he ate, because he secretly found it adorable.

They washed the dishes while Daeul watched TV. Kyungsoo’s phone rang. Daeul ran to give it to him.

“Do Kyungsoo, yes…Ah, I understand…I’ll be on my way, doctor.” Kyungsoo’s tone was so clipped, Baekhyun and Jongdae exchanged looks. “Jongdae, sorry I have to go. Emergency in the hospital,” Kyungsoo typed quickly. Jongdae nodded, telling him to be safe and thanking him for coming over. Kyungsoo said goodbye to Daeul, promising to bring dessert next time. Once Kyungsoo was out the door, Baekhyun realised something. Kyungsoo was his ride home.

After cleaning up, Baekhyun said he had to go to catch the last bus. Daeul pouted. They didn’t even get to play. Baekhyun apologised but Daeul started crying. Jongdae knelt in front of him, making him feel better. But nothing worked. Jongdae looked up to Baekhyun for help. He was the preschool teacher after all.

“Aigoo, we can play on Monday, Daeul-ah.” Baekhyun reminded him while he knelt in front of the crying child. “Spend tonight with appa, okay? It’s his birthday, right?” Baekhyun wiped his tears. He wanted to bite Daeul’s rosy cheeks so much. The kid nodded. “Don’t cry, please. Appa will be sad on his birthday. We don’t want that, right?” Daeul nodded again. “You’re a good boy, remember. Give appa a hug later, okay? I’ll see you on Monday. We can eat Ramyun and Gimbap again if you want. Give me a kiss so I can be safe.” Baekhyun offered his cheek.

Daeul moved to the edge of the sofa and wrapped his chubby arms around Baekhyun’s neck and placed a kiss on his cheek. Suddenly, Daeul didn’t let go. Baekhyun tried to break free but the kid whined. He looked at Jongdae for help. The beta tried to pull Daeul away from Baekhyun but he started throwing tantrums. Baekhyun was really going to miss the bus at this rate. Jongdae scratched his forehead.

“It’s past his bedtime so he’s a little difficult.” Jongdae stated. Baekhyun nodded, picking up Daeul.

“I’ll put him to sleep. Is that okay?” Baekhyun tested the waters.

“Wash him first. Bathroom’s on the left. Daeul’s room is beside it.” Jongdae pointed. Baekhyun nodded, carrying the sleepy child to the bathroom.

After an hour, Baekhyun came out of Daeul’s room quietly. Jongdae finished organising Daeul’s toys.

“Jongdae, do you know about this?” Baekhyun gave him a paper; one with Daeul’s writing. Jongdae read what Daeul wanted for Christmas; his parents together. He gulped hard and folded the paper.

“He may have said it a few times.” Jongdae tried to keep his voice even.

“I don’t mean to pry or anything but who is his other parent, Jongdae? He’s been telling me about being lonely other kids had two parents.” Baekhyun tried not to overstep.

“It’s not something we like talking about, Baekhyun. Thanks for putting him to sleep but shouldn’t you be going?” Jongdae sighed, not wanting this topic to go on further. Baekhyun narrowed his eyes. Something was off. He had to do something.

“Why won’t you tell him, Jongdae?” He whispered, taking a step closer. Jongdae’s back began to sweat. “You must've been scared because everything changed. Maybe that's why you couldn't tell Daeul right away but why didn’t you tell me about him?”

They were face to face already. Jongdae knew what the other meant. He knew he had to face this sooner or later but how did he know? Did Kyungsoo slip?

Baekhyun didn’t look mad. He was simply...hurt. Jongdae didn’t know what to say. No matter how many times he prepared for this day, he really wasn’t sure how to approach it.

“Why didn’t you tell me he was already inside you before you left? Jongdae, why did you put yourself through that when you know I’ve always been right here?” Baekhyun’s voice broke as he spoke through his tears. "I've been scared too, Jongdae. I thought I lost you forever. I was so scared alone, Jongdae. I needed you. All my life I have and you just left. I was so scared, Jongdae." He slid his hands on Jongdae’s waist as if he’s trying to find comfort in the one person he’s trusted all his life. Jongdae kept his head and gaze down.

“Why did you take him away from me? We could’ve done this together. Why are you so cruel to me, Jongdae, to yourself? You think you can do everything alone but you can't. That's why I'm here! Why can't you see I've always been here?” Baekhyun managed to push the words out through gritted teeth. He pressed his forehead to Jongdae’s, eyes closed as tears fell down his cheek. Baekhyun’s shoulders shook as he sobbed quietly.

Jongdae closed his eyes, swallowing thickly. His knees felt weak having his alpha this close again. Baekhyun cried in front of him, his heart laid out for Jongdae. The beta couldn’t do anything but listen. He never thought it would hurt Baekhyun this much. He assumed Baekhyun wouldn’t care because he’s an alpha. But the alpha kept whispering why; his grip on Jongdae’s waist tightening. Jongdae couldn’t say anything to make it feel better. He couldn’t apologise because it wasn’t what Baekhyun needed.

Jongdae wanted to tell him he was scared too. He was so scared the baby or he would die. He was scared to raise an unknown by himself. He was scared to tell Baekhyun the truth because he felt that the other was destined for someone. He's always believed that he stole Baekhyun's virginity, that he's the bad guy undeserving of happiness. Jongdae's been scared to smile since it happened. Because a minute of happiness equated to years of agony in his eyes. He felt like he didn't deserve Baekhyun the most because the guy was too kind, too attractive, too caring, too perfect for someone lacking like Jongdae. Oh they've been so scared of hurting each other that they've been hurting themselves. But it's not just them anymore. Daeul. Daeul's the only one that made them swallow these irrational fears. He's the only one that showed the both of them that happiness wasn't temporary if they let it. Jongdae and Baekhyun have been teaching the kid to be courageous, kind, and happy; anything they weren't. Such hypocrites of them. Such lies to be taught. But one had the courage to stop this silly game.

Baekhyun reached in his pocket. He sniffed as he got a small black box out, looking at it. “I was,” he hiccuped, gasping for air. He felt so frustrated to be this emotional. “I was saving for this until high school graduation and I—I,” he gasped, hiccuping after. Baekhyun was close to cursing himself. It was getting embarrassing already but he had to push through. He had to tell Jongdae what he kept for years.

“I forgot to give it to you that day, graduation day. You-y-you kissed me and I just forgot.” He let out a laugh. “I can be an idiot but this,” Baekhyun stopped talking, frustrated with himself for still crying so much. He exhaled and raised his head to look at Jongdae again. “Jongdae, I wanted to m-m-marry you since Minseok broke up with you, even before Minseok honestly. I—I,” he gasped several times, wiping his eyes with his sleeve, feeling pathetic for sobbing this much. “I thought you loved me too.” Baekhyun covered his mouth with his arm, masking his hiccups.

The way Baekhyun’s breaking down in front of Jongdae seemed like a dream. He’s known to be so strong, so happy, so put together. That’s not the case now. Everyone has a weakness and Baekhyun has one, maybe even two now. Jongdae felt a tear escape his eye. He didn’t mean to break the strongest person he knew. He just...there’s really no explanation or description for what he did. He just saved himself.

“I don’t know if, if you still want this but,” Baekhyun hiccuped. “I want to be part of your life, in Daeul’s. I can’t bear seeing him look around when other kids’ parents are there and he has no one. I just can’t anymore, Jongdae. I missed four years of his life already. Please let us be a family, Jongdae. I’ll do anything. Please take me back, Jongdae. I love you both so much. Please tell him I’m his dad.” Baekhyun wiped his nose with his sleeve. He gasped and hiccuped through the tears. Suddenly, the alpha knelt on the floor.

Jongdae closed his eyes in pain. This wasn’t happening. Baekhyun wasn’t doing this to him. He’s lowered himself once, he couldn’t be doing to again to the same person. Who was Jongdae to receive this? Why would he keep doing this for Jongdae? An alpha lowering himself was a shame to society. Come to think of it, they were both shameful already; as an alpha who impregnated a male beta and a male beta who got pregnant. They’ve defied science by a selfish need to feel. The consequences rushed like a wave, drowning both of them.

Baekhyun waited for an answer. Jongdae opened his mouth and closed it again. What would he say? How could say it? Baekhyun shook his head, looking at the box in his hand. He placed it in Jongdae’s hand, stood, and left quickly. He felt like he embarrassed himself enough already.

Jongdae fell back on the chair, head in his hands. All the kept tears of struggle, pain, and guilt came out. He covered his mouth with his hand so muffle the sound. He didn’t want to Daeul to see or hear him like this. He’s been so stupid to think Baekhyun didn’t want him, their son, but that’s all he wanted after all. It’s stupid for Jongdae make that decision for them. Baekhyun waited for so long, endured so much just so Jongdae would see how much he loved him from the beginning. He was right to say Jongdae’s cruel. He did deprive Baekhyun of those special moments in Daeul’s life and vice versa.

It’s not like Jongdae wanted to keep it forever. When he saw Baekhyun again at the mall, he controlled every part of his being to not hug his best friend. When they saw each other in Daeul’s school, he wanted to tell him there and then. Even when Baekhyun called to pick up Daeul immediately, he wanted to tell him to stay with their son until he felt better. But the greed and pride won over.

In truth, Jongdae seeing Baekhyun with Daeul made his heart swell. His two loves got along so well without knowing they were a part of each other. He loved how Daeul was picking up Baekhyun’s mannerisms little by little. When they had coffee together, he wanted to tell him there. He wanted to tell him that Daeul kept looking for him. Every single time Jongdae saw Baekhyun, his guilt washed over for not giving Baekhyun a chance. He’d be a wonderful father, he thought, if he only told him right away.

When they fought for the last Gimbap, Baekhyun wanted to kiss him after that. He wanted to tell him he missed him so much. He was ready to take Daeul in as his stepson. How the stars aligned for Baekhyun when he found out this wonderful kid was his son. Chanyeol was right about the resemblance. Even Daeul’s giggles sounded like Baekhyun’s at times. Those similarities weren’t something to be learned. They were inherited. How could Baekhyun miss that?

It’s not that Jongdae didn’t want to tell Daeul too. He just…didn’t know how to say it, how to explain why it took so long for them tell him. Jongdae felt all the emotions hit all at once; all the feelings he kept for four years. He didn’t know how to fix this when it’s been so wrecked for so long. How could he fix it when all three of them were hurting?

Little did he know that Daeul heard everything. He was woken by the empty space on his bed then heard Baekhyun’s hiccups. He tiptoed out of his room to see the two crying to each other. He saw how Baekhyun knelt in front of Jongdae, begging for forgiveness, for a chance to be part of their lives again. It wasn’t his position to do that. Jongdae should have begged Baekhyun. The truth was finally in front of Daeul.

He went back to his room with his lower lip trembling. The boy cried in his room calling appa, both of his fathers. He wasn’t mad either. He was just upset his dad, dads, cried. He was upset no one told him. He was upset the person he trusted the most betrayed him. He felt like he truly had no one anymore. He didn’t understand why Baekhyun’s been away but he didn’t like the sadness. Jongdae never taught him how to be that. Daeul had to learn this unfortunate feeling by himself and coped with it by himself too.

Once all the tears worn him out, Jongdae looked at the box Baekhyun left and got the ring. It was simple but very like them. Jongdae didn’t think twice and wore it. He’s been waiting for this day. He wanted Daeul to have a family. Plus, being alone was getting too lonely. He’s determined to make this better now, even if it was tough. He had to sacrifice his feelings for his son. In that moment, he’s learning what being a parent was truly about.

When Jongdae visited Daeul, he was asleep. The poor kid cried himself to sleep. Jongdae kissed his forehead, whispering that he’ll make his wish come true sooner. Jongdae joined him in bed, sleeping beside his son. Daeul needed this the most. Jongdae needed to let him feel that he wasn’t alone and will never be as long as he and Baekhyun love him.

* * *

Monday came. Daeul waited outside the teacher's room after school. He brought his favourite stuffed toy to show Baekhyun. Chanyeol came out, recognising his student that goes missing during his class. He squatted in front of him with a kind smile. Teacher Chanyeol was always approachable and lovable because of his features. He's just freakishly tall.

"What are you doing here, Daeul-ah? Shouldn't you be going home?" Chanyeol spoke adorably.

"Seonsaengnim, where is Baekhyun seonsaengnim? He promised we'd play today." Daeul frowned.

Chanyeol got it. Baekhyun didn't go to work that day. He said he wasn't feeling well but he sounded like he cried too much. Chanyeol looked at Daeul and told him Baekhyun was sick. The child sulked further, asking for the teacher’s address to visit him. Chanyeol brought him to the dismissal area instead to look for his dad.

"Mr. Kim, I found him waiting inside. He's a little upset. Aigoo," Chanyeol rubbed Daeul's cheek. He couldn't control himself.

"Why, did anything happen?" Jongdae brushed Daeul's hair off his forehead.

"No, no. He was waiting for Baekhyun seonsaengnim but he didn't go to work today. Don't worry Daeul-ah, he'll be back soon. Cheer up, okay?" Chanyeol ruffled his hair and excused himself.

Daeul wasn't his usual self for days. Baekhyun still hasn't returned. Their play dates were getting postponed further. Daeul didn't even share his day anymore. He just sulked in his seat or slept. Jongdae was missing Baekhyun too. Seeing him was probably a bonus for Jongdae. He did check him out several times too. He wished Baekhyun would return soon so Daeul wouldn't feel upset. Jongdae's ways didn't even work anymore. Whatever mark Baekhyun left on the kid equalised the hole he left when he wasn't around.

One afternoon, Jongdae got worried that Daeul got stuck somewhere. It's been an hour since dismissal and most kids were fetched already. Chanyeol passed by, seeing Jongdae there.

"Mr. Kim, what are you doing here?" Chanyeol smiled nervously.

"To pick up Daeul. Do you know where is he? It's been an hour. Did he go with Baekhyun?" Jongdae was about to lose his wits, running his hand in his hair, checking his phone.

"Huh? Baekhyun hasn't reported for a week already. Daeul wasn't in class today too." Chanyeol's brows furrowed.

"There must be a mistake. I dropped him off today." Jongdae thought he heard wrong.

"But he wasn't in my class today, sir. I can show you the attendance from his other teachers today too." Chanyeol offered.

Jongdae didn't need that. He needed his son. They checked the gates footage that morning and Daeul never got in. Jongdae's heart dropped. His boy was missing.

He started contacting Kyungsoo to check their apartment and the places near it. He didn't know who else to call. Jongdae saw Baekhyun's name in his contacts.

"Excuse me, but is this Baekhyun's number?" Jongdae showed it. Chanyeol confirmed.

"Mr. Kim, I will inform you if we see Daeul around here." Chanyeol offered.

Jongdae ran to his car, phone stuck to his ear. "Come on, pick up Baek. Please," it was his 6th missed call. Kyungsoo and Baekhyun knew that once it reached 7th, they really had to call him back. But the missed called reached 9th. Jongdae drove around, asking people if they saw a little boy wearing dark blue shorts, a striped red shirt and dark blue velcro light up shoes. He also described the backpack he used. No one still saw him.

Jongdae was about to lose hope as he sat on the sidewalk. His boy could be anywhere, be with anyone at this point. He buried his head in his hands, so worried if Daeul was okay. He’s thinking where the child could’ve went. He got up and walked a little more. There was no use in staying still, he thought.

"Jongdae-ah!" The beta turned around just in time for Baekhyun's embrace.

"I'm so scared, Baek. I'm so scared for Daeul." Jongdae mumbled, his walls crumbling. Baekhyun held his head, apologising for not coming sooner. He kissed Jongdae's head, calming him. He was feeling the same but one of them had to be brave now.

"How did you find me?" Jongdae was baffled, holding on to him tightly.

"Tracked your phone. Chanyeol called me. You weren't picking up." Baekhyun pointed to his pocket. Seven missed calls from Baekhyun. He asked what happened but the other fidgeted while explaining.

"Shhh, we'll find him. Come on.“ Baekhyun placed a chaste kiss. That's one way to pass bravery. Jongdae seemed to gather his wits. The alpha held his hand, running to the train station to check. The sun was setting and Daeul was nowhere to be found. It worried Jongdae further when no trace of Daeul was seen in the stations.

Baekhyun closed his eyes and tried to remember everything the kid told him.

"This is all my fault. I should've told him sooner. He's been waiting for you to play with him since last week." Jongdae sighed, hands rubbing his eyes. "Baekhyun, what if we don't find our son? What if someone took him? He's gonna be so cold soon." Jongdae bounced on his toes, lips trembling from the cold and nervousness. Baekhyun put an arm over him, assuring that Daeul's okay. His gut feeling was better than Jongdae’s and it assured him that the kid was still alive.

"Jongdae, what does Daeul love the most?" Baekhyun was getting an idea.

"There's a lot;” Jongdae tried to understand where Baekhyun was going with this. “Epe, cheese crackers, orange slices, Tom and Jerry, dinosaurs, anything stripes, his light-up shoes,"

"Wait, go back, go back!" Baekhyun listened.

"Light up shoes? Stripes? Dinosaurs? Epe?"

"Fuck, how could we miss that?" Baekhyun laughed. “He’s been wishing a lot of stuff for Christmas. Where's the biggest Christmas tree at the moment?"

"At the Dino...shit!" Jongdae ran immediately, Baekhyun behind him.

They got to the Dinosaur Museum, which was beside the biggest Christmas tree in the city. They split up, checking everything around it. He could be around the tree or even under it, depending on the kid’s mood.

Baekhyun entered the museum and checked the raptors section. He saw something light up beneath one of the installations. He walked around it, heart beating faster. There he saw Daeul looking up at the raptors in awe. The kid clasped his hands together and closed his eyes. Baekhyun moved closer, wondering what the kid was up to.

"Raptor, raptor, please grant me a wish. Appa’s busy. Seonsaengnim is sick. Santa’s busy. Can I wish for you to bring me my other daddy?" Daeul wished reverently. Baekhyun looked around, noticing they were alone. “Please read my mind, raptor. I know his name and his face. Please bring him home.” Baekhyun walked towards the child quietly.

He knelt beside Daeul, rubbing his back gently. Daeul opened his eyes, seeing Baekhyun beside him with a sad but grateful smile. His eyes glistened upon hearing his son’s wishes. The gods and dinosaurs know how long Baekhyun’s waited for this moment; for his son to look for him, look at him lovingly. Daeul looked at the raptor then Baekhyun then back to the raptor then Baekhyun. Daeul looked 100% convinced the raptors granted his wish. The alpha almost laughed. Kids were really cute.

"Seonsaengnim?" Daeul frowned, looking similar to Jongdae’s lips. Baekhyun combed his hair with his fingers, slightly tearing up. Admittedly, he was worried sick when he saw the missed calls. He just got out of the shower when Chanyeol called again, saying Daeul was missing. He called Jongdae but got nothing. That’s when he started running. He wasn’t going to do the same mistake he did four years ago. He wasn’t going to let them go this time.

Baekhyun ran with all his power to get to where Jongdae was. He bumped many people, almost got his by cars, but nothing was going to stop him anymore. Jongdae needed him. Daeul needed him. He needed them. So Baekhyun ran. He ran with Jongdae, ran away from the sadness, to find their happiness. What a work of fate that Baekhyun found him.

"No, Daeul-ah, my Daeul-ah," Baekhyun whispered, holding the child's arms to face him. The kid blinked, tears about to spill from his eyes.

Jongdae saw them together in front of the raptors. His heart calmed a little. Daeul saw his dad, confused why they're together again and why his teacher was about to cry in front of him. It must be true then, Daeul thought.

Jongdae nodded to Daeul, hope and fear mixing in his eyes. The kid looked at Baekhyun, touching his face. It was true. Baekhyun held his tiny hand, kissing it while tears ran down his face while he whispered the kid’s name, apologising for taking so long.

"Appa?" Daeul called, his lower lip trembled, trying to control his tears. "Appa, don't cry." His stepped forward, hugging Baekhyun gently. Jongdae looked down to wipe his eyes. Daeul stood front of Baekhyun, wiping his eyes using his tiny hands. Baekhyun chuckled, hugging his son.

"I"ve waited so long to meet you, Daeul-ah." Baekhyun whispered, kissing his forehead. "Appa's here now. We're here now, Daeulie." The kid still pouted while he kissed Baekhyun's cheek.

“Why?” That’s all the kid managed to say while he teared up.

“It’s hard to understand now, okay? We’ll,” Baekhyun sniffed. “Aigoo, you’re going to make me cry again.” He hugged the poor boy tighter. “We’ll tell you when you’re older, okay?” Daeul nodded while he rubbed his eyes.

Baekhyun whispered that everything will be alright, that he wasn’t going away anymore. He promised the child that he’ll love his dad just like how he’ll love him. He promised that they’ll love each other for him. Daeul nodded, still rubbing his eyes. Baekhyun kissed his cheeks, telling him one last time to not cry. Baekhyun noticed Jongdae wiping his eyes with his head down.

"Daeul-ah, look who's here," He pointed for Daeul. The kid frowned upon seeing his dad crying too. “We wouldn’t want him to see us sad, right?” Baekhyun mumbled, smiling a bit. Daeul nodded, urging himself to stop crying. It looked like he was trying to force his poop out. It made Baekhyun chuckle. Daeul nodded as Baekhyun whispered something to him. They both stood up, hand in hand, making sure they were smiling.

"Appa, you came!" Baekhyun and Daeul called out to Jongdae. The beta scoffed at the cheesiest welcome.

Baekhyun urged Daeul to step forward to meet Jongdae halfway. "Appa, forgive Daeulie for running away. He will never do it again. Promise." Daeul looked so contrite while he held his pinky up, swaying his body in shame. Jongdae nodded, ruffling his hair while he wrapped his pinky around the tiny one.

"As expected, like father, like son. Running away should be banned. Put that in the house rules." Baekhyun scoffed. Jongdae kicked his butt.

Daeul covered his mouth when he laughed. He noticed something different on Jongdae's hand. Daeul tried to pull it off. Baekhyun looked at what the kid was doing. His jaw dropped upon seeing the ring around Jongdae's finger. The beta hooked his fingers between the alpha and smiled peacefully. Daeul hugged their legs, really happy. He thought dreams do come true. He thanked the raptor for giving him this gift better than Santa did. He promised to offer raw chickens next time. Jongdae laughed.

“What? Ah, no, no, Daeul, that can’t be!” Baekhyun stopped Daeul, panicking at the kid’s intentions. A laugh escaped his lips but he had to teach his kid.

“Kim Daeul, daebak!” Jongdae encouraged his son further. Baekhyun hit his leg.

Offering raw chickens to a museum wasn't right. Baekhyun said they'll just offer something else and just eat the chicken on the raptor's behalf. It sounded good to Daeul. Jongdae was gathering his wits, fanning himself from laughing so much. Baekhyun tried to conceal his smile but failed horribly. Daeul was different indeed.

They left the museum with Daeul on Baekhyun's back. They were chuckling about chicken when they heard someone call Jongdae. Baekhyun put Daeul down and held his hand.

"Minseok, hi," Jongdae eyed Daeul, thinking if the kid remembered him.

"Daeul-ah, hello!" The kid hid behind Baekhyun's leg. "Oh. Oh, y-you're Jongdae's mate," Minseok was shocked Jongdae managed to get…an alpha.

"You remember Baekhyun, right?" Jongdae smiled proudly.

"I thought he was a beta." Minseok chuckled embarrassed.

"No, full alpha." Baekhyun stood intimidatingly. Daeul tried to copy his stance. Jongdae chuckled at them.

"We'll see you around, Minseok." the beta ended at that, pulling his two loves away from a fight.

"I still hate him." Baekhyun frowned. Daeul nodded. Jongdae couldn't do anything about it. Like father, like son.

* * *

Things spread like wildfire when Daeul saw Baekhyun at the hallway after a long day. He just screamed appa and ran to him. Chanyeol’s eyes went wide upon hearing it. The other teachers gasped. Baekhyun knelt on the floor, putting his things down to meet his son. The teacher didn’t even hide it. He kissed Daeul’s hair and asking him how he was.

The news was solidified when Daeul was fetched. Jongdae waited with his phone in hand. Chanyeol pulled Baekhyun aside, letting Daeul run off for a bit.

“Care to explain?” Chanyeol smirked.

“Yeah, he’s my son.” Baekhyun shrugged.

“What? You didn’t know he was your son?” Baekhyun covered his mouth with his own hand.

“I got Jongdae pregnant four years ago. He just told me two weeks ago. I told Daeul to keep it a secret until we fixed the papers but he just slipped.” Baekhyun rolled his eyes.

“You got a beta pregnant. A male beta, wow Byun.” Chanyeol looked like he was mind-blown.

“Rock the anatomy, I guess.” Baekhyun smirked, leaving a troubling image in Chanyeol’s mind.

Daeul was already with Jongdae when Baekhyun came. They just wiggled brows in understanding.

“That’s no use anymore. This guy screamed appa at the hall a while ago.” Baekhyun pinched Daeul’s cheek. The kid slapped his hand repeatedly.

“Aigoo, there goes our whole revelation plan. Ah Daeulie, what to do? You’re washing the dishes tonight as punishment.” Jongdae pinched his other cheek. Daeul was so irritated by his dads for pinching his cheeks, he kept slapping their hands, whining to quit it. The two only laughed at him. The kid was starting to regret having two dads if it meant two bullies in his life.

Kyungsoo visited more often too. He was relieved the secrecy was over. Jongdae and Baekhyun still lived apart but sleepovers were frequent. Baekhyun was due to move in with the two just before Christmas. Daeul was so excited, he even cleaned up his toys to make room for Baekhyun’s stuff. It was easier for Kyungsoo to hang out with them, cheaper too.

Jongdae was relieved, so relieved he started singing again. Daeul probably had the hardest time dealing with it. Baekhyun always joined Jongdae when they sang, intensifying the volume. Daeul covered his ears, brows furrowed, with a pout when this happened. But no matter how much his parents annoyed him, he wouldn’t trade it for the moments where he would check on them while he played.

Baekhyun graded papers while Jongdae clung beside him on the sofa. Sometimes, Jongdae would be cooking while Baekhyun hugged him from behind. Daeul liked seeing his parents being clingy to each other. He would get jealous sometimes but he felt that they loved him so much.

One night, Baekhyun took a photo of the three of them in bed and posted it on his SNS. The papers were finally fixed and he was able to claim Daeul as his son officially. A minute after posting, Jongdae’s phone started ringing. Daeul laid on Baekhyun’s chest, his dad teaching him to heart photos on Instagram.

“Hello?” Jongdae sat up.

“Kim Jongdae, you need to bring Baekhyun over for Christmas!” His mother?

“What? Why?” Jongdae whined.

“He just posted on SNS! Aigoo, you three look adorable!” She gushed. Jongdae motioned for Baekhyun to come close. He put the call on speaker. Daeul latched on Baekhyun’s back, arms around his dad’s neck.

“Why do you have SNS, Mom? Are you following Baekhyun?” Jongdae was appalled if not embarrassed.

“Yes! Is he there? Baekhyunnie! Aigoo! I missed you, son! Come over for Christmas, okay?” She kept going. Baekhyun checked his followers list, looking for Jongdae’s mother’s SNS. He started laughing when Jongdae’s baby photo appeared as the display photo.

“Yes, eommonim, we’ll visit soon!” Baekhyun answered. Jongdae hit his arm, shaking his head. Baekhyun stuck his tongue out.

“Okay, tell Daeul-ah to study well, okay?”

“Yes!” Daeul answered.

“Okay, we’re going, Mom. Stay safe.” Jongdae said quickly and hung up. He hit Baekhyun’s arm again for agreeing to see his parents.

“What? My parents want us over too. How come they’ve known I had a son and I didn’t?” Baekhyun showed a text saying they’ve known for a long time.

“Ah, Mom!” Jongdae whined, hitting the pillows. Daeul started hitting pillows to mock his dad. Jongdae didn’t appreciate it. He tackled his son, tickling him. Baekhyun joined in, teaming with Daeul. By the time Jongdae gave up, Daeul was sleepy. Baekhyun got him for a bath and a bedtime story while Jongdae rest. It was a routine already.

* * *

The meeting with their parents went well than expected. The Kim’s raved about Baekhyun while the Byun’s were all over Jongdae and Daeul. By the time they got home, it was Christmas already. The two snuck in Daeul’s room, waking him at 4am for his present. When they got back in their room, two wrapped presents were on the bed.

_Appa Jongdae, Merry Christmas! Thank you for giving the best Christmas gift Appa Baekhyun. I love you. Daeulie_

_Appa Baekhyun, Merry Christmas! We will have more Christmases together. Never go again! I love you._

_Daeulie_

Jongdae opened his present; a polaroid photo of them when they went to the park. Daeul took it himself. They thought the kid was just having fun with it but the photo came out well. Baekhyun opened his and laughed. It was also a polaroid of them but in a frame much better than the photo. The photo was even crooked inside. Jongdae chuckled.

“He’s got your humour for sure.” Jongdae’s laugh boomed now.

“Why’s he so nice to you? Yours is wrapped prettily and mine’s like he wrapped a fish!” Baekhyun pouted. Jongdae kept laughing, rolling on the bed. Baekhyun tackled him, fake wrestling him.

When they were spent, they laid shoulder to shoulder, staring at the ceiling. Baekhyun deftly reached for Jongdae’s hand and held it. He sighed contentedly, feeling Jongdae’s pulse against his wrist. He looked at his love. Jongdae had his eyes closed with his signature kitten curl against his lips. How everything came to this, Baekhyun would never imagine. If people asked him how he’d see himself after education, it wouldn’t be like this with his best friend.

He leaned over him, kissing him softly. Jongdae opened his eyes quickly, blinking multiple times as he swallowed. Baekhyun looked at him warily, cheeks heating. He immediately turned to the other side and curled into a ball, covering his face with a pillow. It was probably the most innocent thing he did in his life. Jongdae turned to his side and slid his arm on his waist, nuzzling his face to the alpha’s nape. Baekhyun turned around and faced him. He held his cheek with a soft smile. Jongdae leaned into his touch with eyes closed. It’s really unbelievable how things turned out between them, Baekhyun thought. He always thought his fate always turned for the worst, like he had to reincarnate just get a better life. Turns out he didn’t, because whoever he was before this life must’ve done something right for him to have the best thing now.

Jongdae pulled him closer and whispered how much he loved Baekhyun. They didn’t have to post it everywhere or make some grand gesture. It was okay with them to tell and have someone, if it’s the right one, know they were loved truly. They whispered their confessions to each other, nodding a bit in understanding. Jongdae told him about how Daeul was brought to this world. Baekhyun understood the scars on Jongdae’s body. Chanyeol was wrong to assume it was a C-Section scar but it helped them recognise the truth. The worst was really over and time to start anew.

Baekhyun’s eyes widened at Jongdae’s request. He was worried about this decision especially since it’s so sudden. The beta’s mind was made up, tilting his head to expose his neck. He whispered to not be afraid, to not worry about him because he wanted it. Baekhyun felt it was better to have some distraction to ease the pain but Jongdae wanted this purely.

The alpha laid him down comfortably then tried to shift his weight on Jongdae. The beta’s hand was on Baekhyun’s bicep and waist to support him. Baekhyun huffed a breath, pressing his lips on Jongdae’s skin first. He warned him to brace himself, which the beta did. The alpha only felt this nervousness when they first mated. His pulse quickened, matching Jongdae’s. He opened his mouth, bearing teeth until it sunk in Jongdae’s skin. The beta screamed to Baekhyun’s hand, gasping afterwards as the alpha pulled back to lick the blood off his skin.

Baekhyun checked if Jongdae was pleased by it. The beta had a huge smile on his face, panting slightly. The alpha leaned down to kiss him deeply. “You’re mine now.” He whispered to his lips. Jongdae nodded, hugging Baekhyun tightly to kiss the side of his face. The alpha nuzzled his face to Jongdae’s neck, the unmarked side and sucked clots for good measure. Jongdae reached for the lamp, turning it off after the alarm.

* * *

The next morning, Kyungsoo entered his best friends’ shared apartment unannounced. He was worried why the front door wasn’t locked. Daeul was on the rubber mat, colouring one of his books. He ran to Kyungsoo upon seeing him. The beta nurse gave his present, watching the kid open it. He thanked Kyungsoo for the dinosaur socks and placed them in his room.

“Daeul-ah, where’s your poor excuse of a parent called dads?” Kyungsoo smirked, very proud of his insult while eating a grape.

“Still in bed,” Daeul answered, pulling a wagon out of his room. It carried five huge dinosaur inflatables with inflatable trees to match. Daeul woke up thinking he was in a jungle with dinosaurs looming over him and trees around his bed.

“Your parents did not give you that.” Kyungsoo’s smile dropped, astonished at the wits of his best friends. Daeul nodded happily, pulling out seven plastic casings of new dinosaur onesies. Kyungsoo groaned but he was smiling. His best friends were real idiots for their son. “I bet they have those too.”

“It will be on SNS in two days.” Daeul shrugged, opening one to wear. Kyungsoo helped him in wear it.

“Are we betting on this? I saw after five days.” Kyungsoo joined for the kid’s delight. “What are we betting?”

“A raptor backpack.” Daeul was tough on his Uncle Kyungsoo.

“Okay. If I win, you’re giving me two of those dinosaurs and a tree. What do you say?” Kyungsoo pointed at Daeul’s inflatables. The kid whined with a stomp, not happy with the prizes.

“Deal.” Kyungsoo laughed, agreeing to it. He wasn’t taking them but anything to boost the kid’s competitive spirit.

“Come on, let’s wake your parents.”

They made their way to the couple’s room, Daeul shaking his tail happily. Kyungsoo opened the door, startling the two.

“Shit, won’t you knock?” Baekhyun screamed, covering his and Jongdae’s naked upper bodies. Kyungsoo’s brows met, very disapproving of the sight. He quickly pulled Daeul’s hood down to cover his eyes, pulling the kid back by the head and locked the door.

“Why’s he early?” Jongdae whined, snuggling beside Baekhyun. “Did Daeul see anything?”

“Don’t think so,” Baekhyun laid back down, kissing Jongdae’s forehead. “I’ll go deal with them.” Jongdae nodded sleepily. Baekhyun bit his lip, proud of the bright mark on his mate’s neck.

Baekhyun went out of the room to scold Kyungsoo’s ears off while Daeul played with his inflatable set that covered half of the living room. Kyungsoo bowed, apologising to his hyung for being rude. Daeul was oblivious to all of it. When Jongdae came out, fresh and showered, he stood behind Daeul, bending forward to kiss his lips while the kid looked up to him. Daeul expressed how happy he was with his gift. At the same time, Jongdae told him how thankful he and Baekhyun was for his gift to them. He blew farts on Daeul’s stomach, playing with him while Baekhyun continued to terrorise Kyungsoo.

When that was over, lunch was being prepared by the betas while the alpha and the baby watched them from the dining table. Daeul frowned at Jongdae’s bandage on the side of his neck. Baekhyun checked activities while everyone was busy.

“Appa!” Both Jongdae and Baekhyun looked Daeul. “What is that?” The kid pointed to Jongdae’s bandage.

“I want to hear how you’ll explain that to him.” Kyungsoo chuckled.

“Santa,” Baekhyun began. Jongdae put the knife down, shocked at his mate’s answer. “Santa was going to take our gift away so…so,” Baekhyun looked at Jongdae for help.

“So?” Kyungsoo pressed.

“Appa fought them, Daeul-ah. We can’t have them take it and give it another kid. You’re nicer than that kid.” Jongdae let it out smoothly.

“But a reindeer bit appa’s neck that’s why it’s bandaged. Don’t worry, it will heal soon.” Baekhyun assured his worried son.

“Whoever that reindeer was, he definitely sleighed through the night.” Kyungsoo quipped, smiling proudly.

If Baekhyun was verbal when it came to scolding, Jongdae was more verbal and louder. He grabbed Kyungsoo by his nape, reprimanding him. Jongdae got his wrists, speaking loudly to his ear. Baekhyun distracted Daeul, asking him if the colours were right on another kid’s homework. When the kid shook his head, Baekhyun chuckled. His son was a harsh critic, just like his fathers.

Two days after, Daeul threw a tantrum to have his parents wear their dinosaur onesies too. Jongdae sighed, rubbing his temples. Baekhyun stacked his papers unwillingly. Once the pair was out in onesies, Daeul smiled, scrambling to get in between them. Baekhyun took a few photos of them then posted the cutest one online.

“I win!” Daeul squealed. The two looked at each other oddly.

_Kyungsoo commented on your photo._

“Tell Daeul he wins. I’ll send the backpack over next weekend. Brat.” Baekhyun read.

“Daeul-ah, did you bet against Kyungsoo?” Jongdae said sternly. The kid nodded.

“Pick a backpack, kiddo!” Baekhyun showed Daeul an expensive catalogue of dinosaur backpacks. Jongdae scoffed at these two. Poor Kyungsoo.

* * *

It’s officially Daeul’s 5th birthday. The kid didn’t want a huge party but only a day out with his dads. They decided it was a great time to have their first family photo taken too. They were dressed in suits, hair neat and combed. Jongdae and Baekhyun sat beside each other, Daeul on their lap. The kid got heavier after Christmas. They cut down crackers and focused on fruits instead.

The first few shots were simple, very formal. The other shots had them wearing dinosaur onesies. Daeul lost another tooth just when the other two grew back. The couple pinched either of their son’s cheeks for fun. One photo had Daeul on Baekhyun’s back, another on Jongdae’s. There were so many fun shots that they decided to collage their first family photo.

It hung proudly in the living room. They all had wallet sized copies of their favourite ones. Daeul kept his in his information tag. Baekhyun’s the one that goes to school with Daeul while Jongdae picked them up. Chanyeol became one of Jongdae’s closest friends, sharing parenting tips with each other. His children were eight and four years old. They planned play days whenever they could. Kyungsoo would tag along just in case they needed an extra hand.

Jongdae finished his work late so he came home after dinner. He saw Daeul’s room open so he guessed the two were in there. Baekhyun sang softly while Daeul fell asleep beside him. The alpha combed Daeul’s hair gently, his own eyes closing slightly. Jongdae washed up and changed into his pyjamas. When he checked in Daeul’s room again, Baekhyun was asleep too. He got the blanket in their room, and placed it over his boys. Jongdae climbed in slowly. Daeul turned, cuddling to Jongdae’s side but gripped Baekhyun’s shirt with the other hand. Subconsciously, Daeul’s been holding on Baekhyun when he could so he wouldn’t leave again. It was some trauma left in him but they all understood. He’d overcome it eventually.

Come to think of it, this entire thing was an accident. From Jongdae and Baekhyun recklessly thinking science would work in their favour, to Jongdae’s unexpected pregnancy and birthing, up to how everything worked out. Truly the hardest things in life were the ones worth fighting for. Jongdae remembered how he had to raised a pup and still get through college. He remembered how many eyes judged him for being a pregnant beta. He remembered seeing Baekhyun again and how that eased his heart. He remembered when he saw Baekhyun and Daeul together for the first time, singing a nursery rhyme. Oh how wonderful those moments were, if only he didn’t go against how life’s planned.

He kissed his son’s forehead then his mate’s. It was definitely nice to live like this. Jongdae closed his eyes. For the first time since having Daeul in his life, he’s finally going to sleep with an easy heart filled with contentment and happiness. He didn’t bother with science anymore. It’s a load of shit along with controlling your life or whatever Minseok poisoned his brain with. Jongdae’s learned to let things be, let life be. It was actually easier that way since an accident became the best thing that happened in his life.

_Breathe. Just breathe. Breathe, Jongdae. Everything will be alright._

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you Lord Chen for this opportunity! I had so much fun making this. To the prompter, hi let's be friends lol! I hope I gave justice to your idea. It's so wonderful and I'd love to write other prompts you have. To the readers, thank you reaching the end. Please love it a lot!


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